I’m back from a sevenyear news coma – so what’s changed, world?

After almost a decade suffering with chronic insomnia, Miranda Levy is back in the land of the living, and discovering what she’s missed

Imagine you have been in a coma for seven years. You wake up and the first voice you hear is Alexa. The Christmas just gone, I started to “come round” after spending more than half a decade in a sleep-deprived fugue. To say I had been depressed doesn’t cover it, really, although that was the diagnosis I was given by a series of doctors – and was the basis of my treatment.

Here’s why. In 2010, I received some upsetting personal news, which kicked off a period of severe insomnia. Initially caused by stress, this chronic sleeplessness took on a life of its own (and is the subject of an online column that I’m writing for The Telegraph).

I hung in there for a couple of years but, from 2012 onwards, there was pretty much a self-imposed media blackout alongside – I was absent, not present in the world. I spent the days reading fiction but I couldn’t bear very much reality. I didn’t listen to the radio, watch television, read the news or really interact with anyone or anything on a meaningful basis. I missed a lot.

Now, Sleeping Beauty (as my friends like to call me) is catching up. Having come round and slowly, but surely, started to face my problems, even grabbing a few hours’ sleep here and there, I am once again joining the world. Every day there are new nuggets to discover, from the funny to the upsetting to the merely mundane. This is what I have learnt about the world so far…

Social media is king, and getting into a twitstorm is really easy to do

Before I “left” the planet in 2012, Facebook and Twitter were firmly established, and I had accounts in both. As the editor of Mother & Baby magazine, I was followed by lots of PRS. The chit-chat from clever journalists and celebrities was also mildly diverting. Then I switched off.

Newly reborn, I am enjoying the verbal exchanges of Whatsapp and Facebook Messenger and funny hashtags. Although, as I discovered this weekend, there is a double meaning to the word “viral”. On Friday night, I sent what I thought was an uncontroversial tweet about the lack of voting choices for a Jewish, historical Labour voter like me. The initial response, from the Momentum trolls, was very unpleasant. It snowballed pretty quickly. And all because of…

The Labour Party anti‑semitism row

I have voted Labour in every election since I turned 18 in 1986. I am Jewish. In the next election, I will not be voting Labour. If I ever had a political “home”, then I no longer do.

The general anti-zionist sentiment in the country also hurts. Many musicians and writers I admire have signed up to the BDS (Boycott, Divestment and Sanctions) petition. I hate the fact that university societies are equating Zionism with Apartheid (we all boycotted Barclays and Outspan oranges in the Eighties; now it’s Bank Leumi and Jaffa oranges). I was on the fence about Israeli politics. Now, I am engaged, reading everything and (almost) sympathise with some of the Israeli government’s policies. I guess this is not what the BDS people are aiming for.

Writing and talking have become terrifyingly politically correct

New words and phrases have entered the lexicon: “humblebragging”, “woke”, “virtue-signalling” and “cis-gender”. Non-binary people are now known by the pronoun “they”, instead of “he” or “she”, which can become a bit confusing. This is not a “hating” comment, just an observation. I don’t want to get into another Twitter storm.

Vaping has become a thing

What are vaping shops, and why are there so many of them on the high street? See, too, coffee shops. And does anyone use those electric plug sockets for cars? What happens when it rains?

Zipwire Boris is now Bad Boy of Brexit Boris

The jolly mayor and presenter of

Have I Got News for You appears to look increasingly likely to become our next prime minister, and could take us out of Europe by the end of

October. I didn’t leave the house to vote in the referendum, and now I wish I had (Remainer, sorry).

Nobody talks to one another any more

My sister-in-law says that each time her mobile rings, she knows it’s me because I am the only person who ever calls her (she is 47, not 15, a GP and a mother of two teenagers). How did this happen?

Everyone has a mental health diagnosis

It’s wonderful that there is no longer a stigma allied to psychiatric conditions. But there does seem to be a bit of a bandwagon. I remember when Catherine Zeta-jones was diagnosed bipolar and it was “fashionable” for a while. Now everyone seems to have ADHD or dyslexia or cyclothymia. Even Princes William and

Shock of the new: vaping, smartphones, box sets and Boris are all the rage, while Labour has an anti-semitism problem

Harry have weighed in. While this is all laudable, the untrendy mental health conditions such as schizophrenia and manic depression (the pre-decimal term for bipolar) deserve to be taken seriously and allocated appropriate resources.

We are now all utterly dependent on Wi-fi

Suddenly we need these invisible airwaves for everything from communicating to buying clothes and food and ordering Ubers. When we can’t access it, we become stressed, upset and violent. It’s only going to get worse. The world will be ruled by BT engineers and those who know how to fix the broadband.

TV has become a new world

Oh, the new joys of Netflix and Amazon Prime. Back in the day, Netflix was about delivering DVDS (remember those?). Now I can catch up on all the box sets I’ve missed: Mad Men, Breaking Bad, Flight of the Conchords, Black Mirror. And there’s Chernobyl on Sky Atlantic and, of course, Fleabag and Killing Eve.

Previously, only hardcore football fans really had Sky. Now, “normal” TV is largely rubbish. But once you tot up your BBC licence fee, Prime, Netflix, and BT Sport (when did our phone company suddenly become a sports channel?), it’s all getting quite pricey.