THE NEXT 48 HOURS RELATIONSHIPS

The next few days would be a great opportunity to set up some guidelines for your relationship over the next lockdown, says Kate Mansfield, a dating and relationship coach.

During the last lockdown, plenty of couples felt suffocated by each other as they struggled to work, live and look after children in the same four walls.

If there is shared workspace, she recommends couples divvy up time when each person can use it alone, perhaps while the other is out exercising, thus giving each person some mental space. “Timetabling can feel clinical but it can work,” she says.

She also recommends making the most of the final 48 hours, and going on a date to a restaurant or cinema which will shortly be closed.

“Go and do the thing you can do as a couple that you won’t be able to do for a while,” she says.

THE NEXT FOUR WEEKS

If you live with your partner, it will be crucial that you schedule in time away from them during the next lockdown, says Mansfield. Needing some time to yourself is natural, and not a mark of a bad relationship, she says. During lockdown, you can make use of your exercise time outside to be alone and get some space.

With someone under your feet all the time, it can be easy for annoyances to build up, which can lead to long-term resentment, she says. Try to nip this in the bud by working through problems as soon as they arise, rather than a bottling them up. Mansfield recommends starting conversations using phrases like “Can we work as a team on this?” to show that you are committed to working together with your partner, rather than claiming the moral high ground.

Things are very different if you are single. Online dating apps are still open, but Mansfield recommends slowing yourself down and using apps just once or twice a day for a limited amount of time, making sure you are thoroughly looking through profiles, rather than just swiping based on looks.

Lockdown has proved to be a surprisingly good time to start a relationship for many of her clients. Social distancing and video call dates encourage you to “focus on finding an emotional bond and finding things out about a person that you might miss if you’re blinded by the sexual chemistry”.

It is still permitted to meet up one-on-one outside, as long as you maintain social distancing, which can be a really good way to get to know someone, says Mansfield. “A much more traditional type of dating emerged – we call it the Jane Austen walk,” she says.

But this might also be a good time to have a break from dating altogether and not feel bad about that, she says: “Use the time to think about what you really want in a relationship and what has gone wrong in the past.”