For the first time ever, Boris has managed to keep his mouth shut
For Boris Johnson, yesterday must have felt daunting. Because, at the age of 56, he was attempting to do something he’d never done before. Keep his mouth shut.
It can’t have been easy. This is a man, after all, who made his name as one of Fleet Street’s most gleefully outspoken columnists. For more than 20 years, he was a devil-may-care purveyor of outrageous opinions on every topic under the sun. Politics, single mothers, the physical attractiveness of female delegates at the Labour Party conference: you name it, he had something scandalous – or at least mischievous – to say about it.
Yet now, as Prime Minister, he’s obliged to present himself as a paragon of tact and restraint, and act as if he has no opinions at all – at least when it comes to a certain subject. Which just happens to be the most eye-popping story of the year.
At yesterday’s Downing Street news conference, journalists practically begged the PM to give his views on the extraordinary remarks by the Duchess of Sussex. Mr Johnson, however, was anxious not to oblige.
“Perhaps the best thing I can say,” murmured the Prime Minister warily, “is that I have always had the highest admiration for the
Queen … As for all other matters to do with the
Royal family, I’ve spent a long time now not commenting, and I don’t intend to depart from that today.”
A man from The Sun had another bash.
An apologetic smile fluttered briefly across the PM’S lips.
“Look,” he said. “I congratulate you on your very determined attempt to involve me in this story, but I really think that when it comes to matters to do with the Royal family, the right thing for prime ministers to say is nothing. And nothing is the thing that I propose to say today…” And that was that. Not a syllable more. Disappointing though it was for the press, you had to hand it to Mr Johnson. This was surely an unprecedented act of selfdenial. For the first time in his life, he had succeeded in not expressing an opinion.
Goodness knows how he managed it. It must have taken every ounce of resolve in his body. The man normally has opinions coming out of his ears.
On The Telegraph website, you can read the entire back catalogue of Mr Johnson’s opinion columns. Reticence and inhibition are in notably short supply.
He’s obliged to present himself as a paragon of tact and restraint, and act as if he has no opinions at all
There is no column headlined, for example, “Europe? Golly, Don’t Ask Me”, or, “The Burka? Crikey! Talk About a Hornets’ Nest! Old Bozza’s Steering Well Clear of That One!”
Yesterday, however, Mr Johnson somehow found the strength to restrain whatever opinion was hell-bent on bursting out of him. Heroically, he wrestled it to the floor, sat on its chest, and, panting and sweating, pressed his hands firmly over its mouth.
I don’t know what Mr Johnson did after the news conference. But I imagine he needed a stiff drink and a lie-down.