The Daily Telegraph
A tale of three women in black bras and heels
Thank you for all the stories about long marriages, both tender and hilarious, and for the legions who pointed out I got my Trumpton mixed up with my Camberwick Green. A grievous error I shan’t be making again in a hurry. If I ever get to the stage where I can’t identify Windy Miller, you have permission to take me out and shoot me.
Both widows and widowers wrote wistfully that they hadn’t realised how irreplaceable their other half was until they’d gone, which made me think I really must appreciate Himself more. Familiarity breeds content, not contempt.
My favourite funny story came from Emma. It’s told in a woman’s voice:
I had lunch with two of my unmarried friends. One is engaged, one is a mistress, and I have been married for 25 years. We were chatting about our relationships and decided
to amaze our men by greeting them at the door wearing a black bra, stiletto heels and a mask over our eyes. We met a few days later, to exchange notes. Here’s how it went...
My engaged friend:
The other night when my boyfriend came over he found me with a black leather bodice, stilettos and a mask.
He said: “You’re the woman of my dreams. I love you.” Then we made passionate love all night.
Me too! The other night I met my lover at his office and I was wearing a raincoat, under it only the black bra, heels and mask over my eyes. When I opened the raincoat he didn’t say a word, but he started to tremble and we had wild sex all night.
Then I had to share my story:
When my husband came home I was wearing the black bra, black stockings, stilettos and a mask over my eyes. When he came in the door and saw me he said, “What’s for dinner, Zorro?”