HE SAID WHAT!
Some of the best managerial quotes from the first part of the season
THERE are lots of mundane postmatch press conferences given by managers every week. “We’re delighted to have got the three points”, “I couldn’t have asked any more from my players”, “The players showed great character”, “We have to move on”. Yawn, yawn.
But every so often the bosses display a sense of humour or blow their top. If they’ve won, they tend to see the funny side. If they’ve lost, they hit out at all and sundry, especially the hapless referee.
As the year draws to a close, John Lyons trawls through The
Football League Paper archives to find some managerial gems from the first part of this season: 6-8-17: Derby boss Gary Rowett on his transfer plans “When you say moving, if I’m in a car on the motorway, I’m doing about 15mph at the moment – but I’m hoping to break a hundred and the police don’t catch me!” 6-8-17: Charlton boss Karl Robinson on Lee Novak’s red card after an early 50-50 challenge against Bristol Rovers
“I’m not going to tell my players to stop tackling. If I’m going to tell them that, we might as well go and play some silly sport.” 13-8-17: Ipswich boss Mick McCarthy praises keeper Bartosz Bialkowski after his side’s 2-1 win at Barnsley “He’s a wizard in the net. He’s unbelievable. I say he’s a wizard – he’s more like an octopus.” 13-8-17: Oldham boss John Sheridan after his side’s 2-1 defeat at Walsall “It’s criminal – you come out second half and I’m just watching totally different players. We’ve only had a 15-minute break. What is it, something in the water?” 13-8-17: Mansfield boss Steve Evans insists he was the pioneer of ‘heavy metal football’
“Klopp thinks he brought the high-pressing game to Britain – I’ve been here for ten years.” 13-8-17: Chesterfield boss Gary Caldwell after
Scott Wiseman was sent off for a foul on Terry Hawkridge in a 2-0 defeat at Notts County “The referee came to a circus and played to the crowd.” 20-8-17: Bury boss Lee Clark after his side’s 3-2 home loss against Bristol Rovers
“The two late goals papered over the cracks. If it wasn’t for my goalkeeper, we could have been on the end of a record defeat at League One level. It was awful from start to finish.” 20-8-17: Morecambe boss Jim Bentley’s unusual take on events after his side lost 1-0 at home against Swindon
“I would rather have lost 5-0 and been outclassed because then I wouldn’t feel as down as I do now.” 27-8-17: Ipswich boss Mick McCarthy’s honest assessment after his side’s 2-0 home reverse against Fulham “Call the police, there’s just been a murder on the pitch.” 27-8-17: Bradford boss Stuart McCall hammers home his point after his side surrendered a 3-0 lead to draw 3-3 at Walsall
“We were just weak in certain areas – weak to stop crosses, weak to go and meet the ball when it came in. Physically and mentally, we were weak.” 27-8-17: Gillingham boss Ady Pennock after Tom Eaves hit a hat-trick in a 3-3 home draw against Southend “It’s us against the world at the moment and we have that siege mentality. It was good to score a goal because that will shut a few people up.” 3-9-17: Bradford boss Stuart McCall after striker Charlie Wyke broke his duck for the season with a hattrick in a 3-1 win against Bristol Rovers
“I was giving him a bit of a ribbing on Friday. I said, ‘Any chance of you chipping in? An attempt will do, let alone a goal!’ He’s stuck two fingers up to me with that!” 3-9-17: Rochdale boss Keith Hill after his side’s 0-0 draw against Phil Brown’s Southend “The game was going in our direction in the first 20 minutes, but then the referee came over to Phil, they had a cuddle and the ref went in a different direction after that. I have full respect for Phil but he’s mesmerised the referee with that touchline cuddle.” 3-9-17: Mansfield boss Steve Evans after Kane Hemmings fluffed the Stags’ third spot-kick of the campaign
in a 1-1 draw with Carlisle
“The next penalty taker for Mansfield Town is my missus. She’s got as much of a chance as any of our lot has.” 10-9-17: Ipswich boss Mick McCarthy insists QPR’s first goal against his side in a 2-1 defeat shouldn’t have stood
“We’ve lost the game and I seem like a moaning old git, but it
was handball (in the build-up).” 10-9-17: Chesterfield boss Gary Caldwell bemoans some early Christmas gifts after a 5-1 drubbing at Crewe
“We just allow teams to score goals against us. It must be like Christmas for teams playing against us at the minute.” 17-9-17: Harry Redknapp
reflects on his last game in charge of Birmingham, a 3-1 home defeat against Preston
“You don’t let people run through the middle of you like we did. I didn’t tell them to do that, that’s for sure, but I take the blame for it – that’s the way football is.” 17-9-17: Sheffield United boss Chris Wilder is peeved after
Norwich turn up late and pinch the points with a 1-0 win
“Was there a big crash in Sheffield today? No? Just traffic. Well, set off a little bit earlier then.” 17-9-17: Steve Bruce has a pop at the critics after his side win 3-0 at Barnsley “I think that’s us unbeaten in six and three clean sheets on the spin, and there’s a crisis! Let’s hope that shuts people up for a little while, anyway.” 17-9-17: Bristol City boss Lee Johnson hails the display of 18-year-old winger Jonathan Leko after a 4-1 win against Derby “Jonathan is like Michael
Flatley, the Lord of the Dance. He is quick, strong, unorthodox and must be horrible to play against.” 17-9-17: Crewe boss David Artell after his side’s 3-0 defeat at Exeter
“If you are in the comfort zone, expect to get your arses kicked – pardon my French – especially against a good team. We
should have been 1-0 up, but the next thing, it’s three bounces, three contacts and three goals.” 17-9-17: Newport County boss Michael Flynn after his side’s 2-1 defeat at Morecambe
“We were beaten up all over the park. In all honesty, I could have substituted eight of them at half-time. They were that bad.” 24-9-17: After a 1-1 draw against Middlesbrough, Fulham boss Slavisa Jokanovic makes it clear he prefers to keep things simple
“A popular question is always where was your plan B, C, D, E, but if this plan is not
better not plan.” 24-9-17: make than Mansfield any plan sense A, then for another it does boss Evans dull 2-1 after Steve win a against “On my Cambridge way home pull into I’m B&Q going and to buy myself a because tin of paint it might and be watch better it than dry watching 24-9-17: Crewe us.” boss David Artell home after thumping a 5-0 Carlisle by them “Some gave up. of don’t Some think of them they gave them up, made but a they conscious did. Some decision of to give up. It was embarrassing.” 1-10-17: Burton boss Nigel Clough after being hammered 4-0 at home against Wolves
“It wasn’t good enough. It’s brilliant that we’ve got the two-week international break now. I wish it was longer. They couldn’t extend it to a month, could they?” 1-10-17: QPR boss Ian Holloway on keeper Alex Smithies after he missed a lastgasp headed chance to equalise against Fulham
“The boys are calling him Toblerone head after that. I wouldn’t have sent him up if I’d known that!” 1-10-17: Peterborough boss Grant McCann hits out after his side’s 4-1 home defeat against Oxford
“It looks like one or two people throw the towel in when we are being beaten. I told the players afterwards that there is no way I’m watching a performance like that again.” 1-10-17: Morecambe boss Jim Bentley after his side’s 4-1 humbling at Exeter “We got our pants pulled down and booted out of St James Park.” 1-10-17: Cheltenham boss Gary Johnson after subbing two-goal hero Mohamed Eisa at Chesterfield
“It was two great finishes from Mo. He was a little bit upset because he thought he still had his legs and he wanted to stay out there and get his hat-trick.”