Kondo wars

The Guardian - G2 - - News -

Name: 34. Marie Kondo.

Age: 34

Who is she? Ev­ery­one’s talk­ing about her, she’s a Ja­panese or­gan­is­ing con­sul­tant.

A what? Oh, look, she’s got a show on Net­flix called Tidy­ing Up With Marie Kondo. I’ve heard great things about it. Shall we give it a go … babe? Re­ally? A whole TV show about tidy­ing up? It’s more than that. It’s about de­clut­ter­ing and how that can make you hap­pier and less stressed.

Can’t we catch up on Les Mis in­stead? Yeah, we will, hon, but de­clut­ter­ing will maybe make us less mis!

Groan. Hey, this is in­ter­est­ing: she has found a spe­cial place in the house of this fam­ily she is help­ing, and they are thank­ing it – the house – for pro­tect­ing and shel­ter­ing them.

For be­ing a house, ba­si­cally? It’s al­most spir­i­tual the way she’s kneel­ing there, eyes closed.

You fancy her! No, it’s not about that. It’s about learn­ing to cher­ish every­thing you have so you can achieve hap­pi­ness for your fam­ily. Zzzzzzz. And look, she’s go­ing to start with clothes, then move on to books, pa­per, komono …

Ki­mono, that is clothes, isn’t it? You’d LOVE me to get rid of them, wouldn’t you? KOmono. It means kitchen, bath­room, garage, every­thing mis­cel­la­neous. Fi­nally she’ll deal with sen­ti­men­tal items. Any­way, look, she’s get­ting all this lady’s clothes out of the clos­ets and draw­ers, and she’s mak­ing a big pile of them all on the bed … I love this bit; look, she had no idea how much stuff she had.

Hang on, have you seen it be­fore? No, no, no. We’re watch­ing it to­gether, for the first time. Maybe you – we! – could get some tips from her. Whoa! Hang on, I see what’s go­ing on here.

Who does all the clean­ing in this house? No, I know. You do, most of it, and I’m go­ing to do more. But this isn’t about clean­ing, it’s about de­clut­ter­ing. And you do have quite a lot of, you know, clothes, and I have no­ticed some sneak­ing in to my space, and that’s fine, in the short term, be­cause ac­tu­ally I did get rid of a load of shirts the other day, be­cause they weren’t giv­ing me any joy. That’s what she says you have to do. And then the stuff that you do keep, she shows you how to fold, this spe­cial way, into three. We could watch a bit more to see if that’s what hap­pens.

Shut it! And you know what thing in this house isn’t giv­ing me joy any more, who I am se­ri­ously con­sid­er­ing get­ting rid of ? Yes, I think I do.

Don’t say: “Ari­ga­tou goza­imasu.” Do say: “Back to Les Mis, then?”

Newspapers in English

Newspapers from UK

© PressReader. All rights reserved.