To play golf with my kind of people
reacquainted me with the peerless pulchritude of Auld Reekie through a series of visits: Comely Bank (flooding my mind with memories of visiting a school friend banished to Edinburgh University to study accountancy; my Walkman tipping The Blue Nile’s Hats into my ears as I sauntered through the autumnal night from Haymarket to his flat); the cobbled streets of Stockbridge, home to a terrific record shop called Voxbox where I got lost in a two-hour conversation about music with what, I suppose, you would call the shop assistant: a 61-year-old raconteur and Top Bloke called Nigel.
On separate occasions I have also experienced the kookily great Summerhall and soldiered through monsoon rain for the last train to Glasgow. Edinburgh, I have increasingly thought, why did I ever favour Glasgow over you?
As I write, though, the best the east has to offer is fresh in the mind. I was fortunate enough to be asked to bring my golf bats through to Archerfield Links, between Gullane and North Berwick, to partner a professional golfer in the Scottish Seniors Open, sponsored by Prostate Cancer UK. Having never been invited inside the ropes in my golf-obsessed puff, how could I say no?
On the first day I rocked up late and missed the first two holes. For the remainder of the round I contributed to the combined score of myself and Swedish pro Anders Forsbrand only twice. The wind blew, and blew, and blew. The highlight was drawing applause from 20 or so punters at the 18th green after nailing an 8-iron. My Lord, what a buzz.
My fellow amateurs included Alex Salmond and Alistair Darling (in separate groupings, I should add), Sir Ian Botham, legendary golf scribe Bill Elliott and Dennis Taylor.
As for the pros, each and every one sported the mahoganied face of a man born to golf. In short: my kind of people. Not before time, I felt at home. So quite why I am moving even further west next month, to Paisley, no less, I have no idea.
‘‘ For the remainder of the round I contributed to the combined score of myself and Swedish pro Anders Forsbrand only twice