THE DIARY
Helpful Prince
WE recently pointed out Prince Philip inspired teenagers with his Duke of Edinburgh’s Award initiative. Though it wasn’t only youngsters he helped.
Retired politician Dennis Canavan recalls the February 1974 General Election produced a hung Parliament. MP William Baxter opined the country should be ruled by a council of state consisting of representatives from every major party. When asked by an interviewer who should preside over this council, Baxter replied: “Somebody neutral, like Prince Philip.”
This triggered demands for Baxter’s resignation. He eventually complied and Dennis was selected to succeed him at the following general election.
“So Prince Philip inadvertently kick-started my political career!” chuckles Dennis.
Soiree, I forgot
AS lockdown restrictions ease, our correspondents look forward to convivial times ahead. They also recall affable occasions of old.
Mary Duncan is reminded of the famous Glasgow folk singer who arrived at a friend’s door bearing a carry-out, and was invited in. After a while he asked his host when the others were coming.
“You mean for the party?” enquired the host.
“Yes,” affirmed the folk singer. “That was last night,” he was informed. “And you were at it.”
Cutting: The queue
DECIDING to get spruced up, Stevie Campbell, from Hamilton, went for a haircut and was confronted by a line of chaps waiting in the street due to limited numbers allowed inside.
A chuckle broke out when, in the glorious sunshine, our reader quipped: “Smashing day for a barber’s queue.”
Camp behaviour
THINKING about holidays, reader Sylvia Glover says: “The best thing about camping is when you get sick of it and go to a hotel.”
Pitter patter
THERE was a business in one of Glasgow’s rougher parts run by a father and daughter. The pair regularly visited the office of David Miller, from Milngavie, who delighted in the Glesga patter exchanged between them, which continued even after one of them had slipped the mortal coil.
David recalls standing next to the daughter as her father’s coffin was lowered into the grave and the heavens opened, drenching them.
The daughter turned to our reader and whispered: “I’ll bet the auld b **** r arranged this.”
Chic chat
THE university of Hull recently revealed it won’t demand correct spelling from scholars’ work because that would be elitist. Which reminds David Donaldson of a Chic Murray line: “Just because you can’t spell ‘Armageddon’ doesn’t mean it’s the end of the world.”
Suspicious minds
BAR room badinage from reader Tom Randall. “Three conspiracy theorists walk into a pub,” says Tom. “Don’t tell me it was a coincidence.”