Master stroke

WE recently mentioned a woman on social media who was desperate to know if the pigeons cooked on Masterchef are the same breed as those tottering around Glasgow’s Central Station.

We’re happy to report that one of her Twitter pals has answered the question, stating: “They send Gregg Wallace out to walk the streets with a big net.”

Not apposite

LAPTOPS are tricky gizmos to operate, which is why The Diary suggests returning to the much more reliable technology of the quill pen. Meanwhile, reader Carol Murray says: “I downloaded a colander app instead of a calendar, and now my battery keeps draining.”