Men and their mental health

It’s a bit of a stereotype that men can have a hard time opening up about their feelings. But everyone struggles sometimes, and looking after our mental wellbeing is crucial – whether that’s reaching out to a mate, seeking professional help, or getting in an endorphin boost. We asked two male mental health ambassadors to share the things that have made a difference to their own mental wellbeing...

Shyam Dattani, global VP of Searchmetrics and co-founder of All Men Cry a fashion brand raising awareness of male mental health, with profits donated to Samaritans (allmencry.com)

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“A few things over the last couple of years have really made a difference for me. One is going to the gym more regularly – it sounds so simple, but it gives you a bit of time out of the day to just look after yourself and have a break from everything else. Plus, it just feels good knowing you’re getting healthier and making a positive change.

“I also started playing golf with my dad. This has really surprised me, as I never thought a golf course was somewhere I’d want to be. But it’s a couple of hours of complete tranquillity (coupled with some terrible shots from me!).

“You’re outside, you’re having a good walk, you’re doing a sport, and although you wouldn’t always know it from the outside, golf courses are real pockets of green space and nature.

“Spending time with my dad this way has been great, too. I booked us a course of six lessons together – it’s great for him as he’s retired, and it means I get to spend time with him, doing an activity we’re both enjoying. And when you’re playing a round of golf, you get to really talk in a way that’s not rushed – because you’ve got 18 holes of conversation to fill.”

Marco Ricci, founder of Talking Mental Health (talkingmentalhealth.com)

“The issue that’s affected me most is social anxiety. Some people believe this is simply a fear of social situations, but in reality, it’s much more. When it goes unchecked, social anxiety can infiltrate even the most everyday tasks – like ordering a meal at McDonald’s, speaking in a public place, or sending a text. It’s an intense fear coupled with an overactive imagination, causing you to continuously ruminate about everything that could possibly go wrong at any given moment.

“To help, I went for cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT), where the most valuable advice I received was to record my thoughts. Initially I was sceptical, feeling silly to be writing down all the ways a situation could pan out – but it’s helped me tremendously. I would list my predictions and then, once I came back from whatever event I had been to, I would revisit the thoughts again. I can safely say that in 99.9% of cases, my predictions were at complete odds with reality.”