Regal opportunity

Let us applaud the monarchy’s move to privatise itself

Britain has a tradition of royal commemorative tat dating back longer than might be imagined. Her Imperial Majesty Queen Victoria was the first to have her mug on mass-produced mugs, and various coronations, weddings, jubilees, baby births, wedding anniversaries and birthdays have been marked with appropriate and inappropriate crockery, glassware, tea towels and biscuit tins. It is odd that the grand institution of monarchy should be so associated with kitchenware, but certain legacies of the Victorian era nonetheless live on.

Yet such symbols of ephemera were usually produced by private enterprise, with the Palace occasionally intervening when the limits of good taste were breached. Now, with Queen Elizabeth II’s 90th birthday soon upon us, the complaint is that the monarchy is itself “cashing in” – with a range of officially approved items for sale at exorbitant prices.

This criticism seems ill-placed. If such profits from the Royal Family’s global fan base can reduce its dependence on hard-pressed taxpayers, so much the better. We are often being told how beneficial the House of Windsor is to the UK economy, and now is a fine time for “the Firm” to prove its commercial worth. The lifestyles of Princes William and Harry could be easily funded by sales of novelty boxer shorts and toy rescue helicopters; jumbo ashtrays designed by the Duchess of Cornwall would surely find a ready market, and the Prince of Wales could easily expand his Duchy Originals range to include more personalised offerings such as a comb-over maintenance kit for balding, ageing chaps the world over. Prince George and Princess Charlotte dungarees and dolls would do nicely, and how about a Prince Philip Action Man?

In fairness, too, the Royal Mail and Royal Mint should hand over a percentage of the profits from the special stamps, coins, mugs and other knicknacks. Imagine if the British monarchy turned a profit, disarmed its critics and helped to pay down the national debt? Surely then they’d be more secure in long reigning over us.