A mask could be a trigger for survivors of domestic abuse
“You don’t know how it makes people feel.”
Grace is one of the thousands of people faced with an impossible decision. Following the government’s new policy on face coverings, every time she leaves the house she has to choose whether to sacrifice her
wellbeing by wearing a mask for the health of others.
On paper, Boris Johnson has done something right by enforcing face coverings in shops, supermarkets and public transport – despite his policy’s predictable lateness. But how this affects the UK’s many domestic abuse survivors is about as straightforward as the prime minister’s “Go to work” speech.
There are exemptions in the policy, but admittedly they’re a bit vague. You needn’t wear a mask if you “cannot put on, wear, or remove a face covering without severe distress”, or “because of a physical or mental illness”.
Domestic violence charity Women’s Aid is pleased with the government’s exemption list, but wants more clarity. “They could describe clearly what that ‘distress’ looks like in an experience of domestic or sexual violence, so women know that the exemption is for them and they don’t have to struggle,” says campaign leader Ruth Mason.
Mason wants to tell survivors that it is not an all-or-nothing rule either. “There might be one day when you can’t wear one, and others when you can.”
But concern from survivors about if and how the rules affect them has prompted charities like The Survivors Trust to put together their own guidelines, including advice on how to make wearing a mask easier, such as trying out wearing one at home, finding one that fits you well and adding your favourite scent.
Like so many, Grace believes that her options are to go out and possibly be judged for not wearing a mask, wear one at risk of being triggered, or stay indoors even longer, until the rule is lifted
The ability to not wear a mask and still feel comfortable in public has been seriously compromised not only by the vague rules but also due to people, including ex-Tories, who are livid that their government might want to stop them from dying, and who refuse to wear one. And our anger towards anti-mask militants can quickly spill onto those with genuine exemptions for face coverings.
“I’m quite happy they’re not doing it [forcing masks] in restaurants and bars, because otherwise I’d be stuck inside again for the next three months,” says Grace. The abuse she suffered was over five years ago, but she has only recently opened up about her past, and the times that she has covered up triggered her anxiety. “When I’m feeling enclosed, I get really panicky.”
Like so many, Grace believes that her options are to go out and possibly be judged for not wearing a mask, wear one at risk of being triggered, or stay indoors even longer, until the rule is lifted. There are “exemption cards”, which people can download and print and carry with them, but some people are reporting that these have already been ignored, or they are worried where the conversation might lead. It’s one thing to announce to a stranger that they have asthma. It’s quite another to admit you’re an abuse survivor.
Some survivors believe that despite the distress they may cause, face coverings should be enforced in order to protect the wider public. But others, like Emma, have decided against them. “I was sexually abused by my ex ... [My] anxiety level of reliving my trauma is unimaginable. I will not wear a mask, even though the thought of the backlash makes me feel sick.”
This year the finger-pointers are everywhere, talking about “my rights” and “your faults”. This is an inevitability of governments that pay lip service to community but encourage us to put ourselves first. Here lies the disconnect between policy and protection.
So, whatever vague rules we receive from government, spare a thought for domestic abuse survivors. When someone decides to go mask-free, we may not always know their reasons.