Top 10... business jargon
We humans love classifying things and lumping them together in neat parcels with silly names, writes John Rentoul
This list started with Rishi Sunak talking about buckets (no 1 on the list). Tom Freeman said “buckets are the new pillars”. Patricia Tarrant added: “Don’t forget the rafts. Although I don’t know whether they go under or on the buckets/pillars (and/or strands or planks).” She asked if someone could do a PowerPoint slide to illustrate. As a second best, you get a Top 10.
1. Buckets. In an interview last month the prime minister said that economic repair, public service reform and improving life
for the next generation were “the three buckets that I’m thinking about”.
2. Pillars. Including ones that “support each other”, which is architecturally doubtful. Nominated by Gemma and Iain Mckinnon.
3. Strands. A feature of the Good Friday/Belfast agreement: Strand One was Northern Ireland’s government; Strand Two was north-south institutions on the island of Ireland; Strand Three was east-west institutions between Ireland and the UK.
4. Silos. Always bad. We must not be trapped in them, we must break out of them. Nominated by Duffer Alert, Phil Lambell and Mark Short.
5. Hats. People wear different ones when doing different jobs. Thanks to Richard K.
6. Value streams. Often a feature of “agile project management”, said the Church Mouse.
7. Suites of policies. “Beloved phrase of the Department of Health,” said Liz Kendall, a former health minister.
8. Tranches. From Old French, meaning slices. Nominated by James Hannam.
9. Platforms. Usually observed from a helicopter view. Thanks to Phil Lambell and Lee.
10. Pieces (of work). Thanks to John Blake.
No room, then, for rafts and planks, or rafts made out of planks. Or for related concepts such as “we play or don’t play” – an odd one, said George Davidson: “I assume it is a sports metaphor but I just picture a playground and swings.” Then there are boxes, for thinking outside of, nominated by John Peters. Paradigms, which always need to be changed (John Wilkin). And guardrails, for keeping things in lanes or tramlines, from Duffer Alert.
Next week: Cheery utopias, such as Narnia (after the defeat of the White Witch), Redwall Abbey, the Shire and the Culture.
Coming soon: Political sayings about meat, starting with “Where’s the beef?”
Your suggestions please, and ideas for future Top 10s, to me on Twitter, or by email to top10@independent.co.uk
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