Elections could be exciting even if no one voted at all
THE recent local elections set me thinking about that strange device, the Swingometer which seems now to have fallen out of fashion.
The swingometer was invented by the political academic Professor David Butler who, I suspect did not take kindly to the nickname ‘Sultan of Swing’.
The device would involve the physical moving of a large arrow which showed the way the electorate was behaving.
Both Jeremy Vine and Peter Snow made use of the Swingometer, the latter via somewhat over-exaggerated mannerisms, his tall thin figure bending this way and that.
Elections always excite me, especially the returning officer’s announcement of the vote numbers and the behaviour of contrasting candidates gathered for the result.
Members of the mainstream parties are obliged to dress somewhat soberly on such occasions, but the fringe participants can have great fun, turning up in a diving suit, wearing a parrot’s head or a three foot high top hat.
I have always been intrigued by the way when interviewed, candidates respond to election results, never admitting there can be any such thing as bad news. I found myself wondering, what would be their reactions if NO-ONE voted at all?
CAND A My party is happy at this result. It leaves us neck and neck with the opposition.
CAND B Not a single spoiled ballot paper! This is a positive sign!
CAND C We are confident that this is a base which we can really build upon.
■ Meantime, I have been giving some thought to the curious case of the managers of Arsenal FC.
The current occupant of that prestigious post goes by the name of Mikel Arteta, whose surname has the same opening two letters as the club he manages.
This is a small coincidence maybe, but worth consideration.
The manager in 1996 was Arsene Wenger.
The first three letters of Arsene are the same as the first three letters of the club.
Blimey, you ask, can such a thing be possible! But there is more.
Only six years ago in 2018, Arsenal’s manager was Unai Emery. Discerning readers will already have made the link.
The opening two letters of this manager’s second name are the same as the opening two letters of the club stadium’s name, The Emirates.
Can any other football club claim such factual oddities? Is any other columnist obsessed with such trivia?
Here at the coast, the mystery deepens – just where is the Palestinian mural?
This mural was created by the young people of Shatila Palestinian Refugee Camp in Beirut, Lebanon when they visited North Tyneside, working with local artists Anthony Downie and Faye Oliver who had also spent time with the youngsters on the camp itself creating street art.
The mural hung on the wall of Tynemouth Metro Station for 12 years when some months ago, following what was said to be a threat to deface it, it was removed by North Tyneside Council and there’s not been a sign of it since.
It’s a pretty big item too – not the kind of thing you could shove in a garden shed.
This has become the latest chapter in a long project.
From 2008, I spent a good deal of time on Shatila Camp, writing a book and working with the young people to create a play which they performed both in Beirut (at the prestigious Theatre Monot, in the Christian area of the city) and also over here in the UK.
The UK trips included performances at Sage, The Customs House, The Exchange and Bellingham Village Hall.
The youngsters were all aged around 13 and although their grasp of English at that age and from that background was understandably slim, they performed the entire play in English and never missed a line or a cue.
I’m not sure what influence these various Tyneside visits had on the actors and then the street artists. Certainly the whole Shatila experience affected me and many others in the UK profoundly and I would always put my faith in those young people rather than in that region’s constantly failing politicians.
Activists to restore the mural are gathering this Sunday at Tynemouth Station Market with a stall.
An event is planned for around 3pm for any who may be interested.
■ Planet Corona – the First One Hundred Columns, IRON Press, £8.00. ironpress@xlnmail.com
I found myself wondering, what would be their reactions if no-one voted at all?