QUOTES of the week

‘This is going goin to put another nail in their coffin. You just can’t trust them.’ Baroness Doreen Lawrence utters her dismay at the Met after confirmation that police spied on her family following son Stephen’s murder. ‘After decades of study, the best, most well-supported advice is still what your mother told you: eat your greens and get plenty of exercise.’

Commentator Tom Chivers boils the ‘sugar/carbohydrates/meat/ alcohol/fat will kill you’ debate

down into one sentence. ‘I don’t know my alphabet, that’s my problem. Inside I feel about 48.’

Actress Prunella Scales,

who at 81 is suffering from a form of Alzheimer’s.

‘If president barraco why barner is he is getting our involved with Russia, scary.’

Blackpool is mocked lass on Gemma Twitter Worrall for her analysis of British diplomacy, later tweeting: ‘Right I get it I’m no good

with politics, I’ll just shh now.’ ‘I was a little nervous when Jamie suggested this but he assured me that he wouldn’t blow the school up.’

Preston headteacher Jim Hourigan,

whose pupil Jamie Edwards, 13, asked to build a nuclear reactor at the school. ‘Good luck in the World Cup – you’ll need it.’

Denmark coach Morten Olsen

holds little hope for England this summer in Brazil despite their victory over his team in a friendly at Wembley. ‘A gentleman or lady always uses a knife and fork.’

Major General James Cowan is appalled at the ‘barbaric’ habit

among the troops of eating sandwiches using their hands.

‘So gay lover of.’

Channel 4 News subtitle

in an unfortunate transcription of Russian foreign minister Sergey Lavrov’s

name as reporter Matt Frei speaks.