QUOTES of the week

‘We can choose to say the task will be too great and say it can’t be done, or we can look forward and believe in the enduring power of the British spirit.’ Theresa May, as Article 50 is triggered.

‘We already miss you. Thank you and goodbye.’ EU Council chief Donald Tusk responds after the historic decision.

‘Walking deficiency syndrome.’ Leading doctor Sir Muir Gray suggests a new term for type 2 diabetes – because the condition is often the result of an unhealthy lifestyle.

‘Hipsters will buy any old tat.’ Twitter user Dawn Jagdev as a shop in trendy North London sells sticks for £18.

‘One weekend she jetted off to do a speech for Hillary Clinton and I did a voiceover for Asda.’ Jack Whitehall contrasts his humble lifestyle with that of his Decline And Fall co-star Eva Longoria, left.

‘Five cop car run-ins, 28 free Krispy Kreme doughnuts and 7,835,627 sexual propositions.’ Lilly Quinn describes the experiences of her five-month hitchhiking trek around the United States with friend Sarah Little.

‘April 1: the only day that people critically evaluate things they f ind on the internet before accepting them as true.’ Twitter user Chris Bailey’s take on April Fools’ Day.

‘I know this is a posh venue but we are going to treat it like a scummy pub and get dancing.’ Ed Sheeran, who performed a charity gig at London’s Royal Albert Hall.

‘The Dalai Lama of debauchery.’ David Tennant’s description of his West End character Don Juan.

‘It’s impossible to please the Greeks and the Trojans. Neither did Jesus please everyone.’ Emanuel Santos, whose bronze of footballer Cristiano Ronaldo was ridiculed.