Harry and Meghan’s plans are a tragedy. But you can’t have your Royal cake and eat it . . .

ABOVE all, l et us be kind about this Royal crisis. There have been times in the past, especially after Princess Di a n a ’s d i v o r c e from Prince Charles, when passions ran too high, factions formed and people said and did things they now have cause to regret.

But when families run into trouble, this danger is always present. And this is a family affair in two different ways. First, there is the Royal Family itself, a group of people who actually do a great deal of quiet good, much of it unrecognised. By doing their duty, they encourage millions of others to do the same, and help to keep the fabric of our society from fraying.

And this works because Britain is itself a large and fractious family. It has all the passions, divisions, jealousies and conflicts of a family. But it also has that fundamental unity, and that readiness to draw together in times of crisis. That is why we in the United Kingdom have found it fitting to remain a monarchy when other nations have cast theirs aside. It suits us, our nature and our character. Not a few republics are quietly jealous of us.

So our first response to the actions of Harry and Meghan is familial concern, not anger or reproof. Why are they so unhappy with their current role? Could anything have been done t o keep t hem from making their declaration of independence? Can anything even now, be done to persuade them to reconsider it?

AND if not, how can this rift be managed so as to allow reconciliation later on, and to avoid burning bridges or slamming doors? We were all so pleased when they married. There could not have been better proof of just how open and relaxed a society this country actually is, than the genuine warmth with which Meghan Markle was welcomed into the Royal fold.

Extraordinary claims have been made that subsequent criticism of her was somehow the result of racial bigotry. But this lazy lie exists only in the minds of those who make the accusation, grievance merchants who prefer discontent to contentment, and boos to cheers. Modern Britain has for many years been one of the most successful multi-racial states anywhere in the world. In truth, where the Duchess’s mixed- race background was mentioned at all, it was warmly welcomed as a sign of the Monarchy renewing itself – yet again – to adapt to modern Britain and its largely happy and successful multi-racial society.

As t hey walked out of St George’s Chapel in May 2018, after a ceremony both inclusive and traditional, there was a universal feeling of renewal and the final sweeping away of ol d t aboos and prejudices. As for Harry, there can be no dispute that he is held in great affection by public and media alike, as a brave, down-to-earth young man who has served his country and approached his Royal duties with good humour and skill. Probably no male member of the Royal Family has been so naturally popular, especially with the young, since the youthful future Edward VIII was Prince of Wales.

It is true that the decision by Harry and Meghan to identify strongly with the climate-change movement has met with some criticism. How could it not do so, given the contrast between their preaching and their way of life? This is why the Queen’s generation stayed so carefully out of any kind of political controversy. You cannot please everybody, and statements that delight some will anger others. And there cannot be a single member of the Royal Family, from the Head of State downwards, who has not at one time or another been criticised for spending on their homes or travel.

BUT what does this matter in the long run? An exciting new Royal era is coming and the Duke and Duchess of Sussex can, if they wish, be part of it. They do not need to bear the heavy burden laid on the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge. As the future King and Queen, William and Kate are far more constrained by protocol and the constant fear of putting a foot wrong. Both have earned huge respect and admiration and Kate in particular has grown into her role as if born to it. She and her family initially faced some snide snobbery. But she has never responded to it. She has simply risen above it, making it look as petty and stupid as it was.

Of course, in their case the pressure is quite different. To be set on a path that leads directly to the most important throne in Europe is to be given both a great honour and a great burden. Harry and Meghan do not face either the responsibility or the glory, and must from time to time wonder how life might have been if they were just ordinary people without bodyguards, palaces, titles and protocol. It may be that their holiday in Canada turned their minds in that direction. And few of us could blame them. Even the Queen herself plainly enjoys the brief moments of informal time she has, in the privacy of Sandringham or Balmoral.

But if they go ahead with their plans – fraught as they are with difficulties over money, status, security and the risk of exploitation – it will be a tragedy. It will be a tragedy for the British people, who will have lost a couple who show a great deal of promise and who have enormous amounts to give this country. And it will be a loss to Harry and Meghan, who will come in the end to miss the immense power to do good that Royalty has, and the unique almost magical status which they now propose to give up. No amount of money or American- style celebrity can begin to replace it. The world of the Obamas and Oprah Winfrey may seem glamorous and welcoming now. But that world is fickle and fashion- prone, and does not have anything to match the deep, lasting loyalty and tradition that sustain the power and appeal of true majesty.

LOOK at the burned-out, uncomfortable and often embarrassing life of the Duchess of York since she cut herself off from the Monarchy. If they leave, it will be a dolorous blow for the Royal Family itself, only just recovered from the wounds inflicted by the death of Diana.

Many supporters of the Monarchy and others alike will also wonder if the couple have fully understood just how much their current influence and fame depend upon their Royal status. They express controversial views and are surprised and resentful when they are criticised. They reject the embrace of the Royal Household, its advisers and experience, and its duties, yet they hope that their high Royal rank will continue to sustain them if they take up residence in another country and branch out on their own in a sort of private corporation.

This is truly wanting to eat their cake and still have it afterwards. Experience will quickly tell them that they cannot actually do this. Common sense should warn them now of this peril.

So, though it seems incredibly unlikely at the moment, let us hope that the couple now count their many very real blessings, reconsider their plans, and their ill- judged action, and change their minds. Millions would be delighted if they did so. They may themselves secretly be less confident about their bold move than they appear.

While we understand t he Queen’s desire for a quick resolution, let us hope that any arrangement is crafted to avoid resentment or a lasting feud, and that a door will always be left open and a light burning in case Harry and Meghan decide to come home.