Santa’s kitchen nightmare

Gordon Ramsay and friends take their culinary odyssey to Lapland (so look out, Rudolph – you may end up as salami)

Pity poor Rudolph. As Gino D’Acampo, Gordon Ramsay and Fred Sirieix (above) take to the road once more, their destination this time is Santa Claus’s back yard – Lapland. And local culinary delights are on the itinerary for this seasonal trek, including the reindeer meat so favoured by Lapps.

After previous trips around Italy, through the heat of Morocco and across North America, this time the stars are braving the far north on an adventurous long drive in their dependable RV.

Though you might hope at their age they’d know a little better (Ramsay’s 54, Sirieix 48 and D’Acampo a relatively youthful 44), they are still very much the same overgrown boys we know and love for their misbehaviour, and are not only excitedly anticipating their encounter with Father Christmas, but also bickering and exchanging brittle barbs in their trademark style as their lumbering male egos rub up against each other.

Though credit where it’s due: while raucous Ramsay and impish D’Acampo battle for control – after all, as chefs they are both used to getting their dictatorial way – it usually falls to the silky-smooth Sirieix to deploy his faultless Gallic diplomatic skills as a maitre d’ and restore the peace when needed.

In between the banter, this is a most welcome escape from the confines of our locked-down island, with the trio and their film crew forming a bubble to visit Finland, where the virus levels have remained very low compared with almost anywhere else in Europe.

The snow is impressively deep and the temperatures almost unimaginably low, but spirits are high as they travel towards the Arctic Circle, a region where the Northern Lights sparkle across the sky and the RV has to be abandoned for snowmobiles or even the more traditional transport of a husky team and sled.

Spending time with the Sami (the only indigenous people in the EU), the three adventurers discover the realities of herding reindeer, trying out a few of the many dishes that can be made from its flesh, including a very special salami and – ugh! – heart, but varying the menu with a spot of smoked wild fish.

With the thermometer plunging to 20 below zero, it’s thermals on most of the way, though the boys do take a skinshrivelling plunge into teeth-chatteringly cold waters for some ice swimming, and also enjoy the relief of a hot sauna.

You’d never mistake this boisterous trio for Santa’s elves, but an hour of their company and antics makes for an enjoyable seasonal gift.