What do we tell children as the world crumbles?
THERE are many occasions I’m thankful I’m no longer the parent of a young child – and this is certainly one of them. What on earth do you tell them about what’s happening in Ukraine? How much do you attempt to protect them from the unfolding drama and terror of war? What to say about scenes that resemble gory Xbox games?
I still recall having night terrors during the Cuban missile crisis, when I would have been just five years old. I don’t recall any discussions about the political drama at the time, either at home or at school, and back then had no idea why I’d wake convinced a bomb was about to drop on our flat. But now I see it was no coincidence.
There was a time when you might have been able to contain information about Putin’s assault on the Ukrainian people by rationing TV or keeping the radio tuned to the pop songs while children were present. But that time has long gone. Phrases such as
‘the start of World War Three’ or ‘War in Europe’ are everywhere, and hearing and reading them is terrifying for us all.
Childcare practitioners often advise parents to explain difficult events to their children (as if any of us can really explain Putin’s destructive urge) rather than letting them silently file away the stories they hear and pictures they see under the broad heading of ‘bad things are going on’.
Thankfully, though, children are brilliant at preoccupying themselves with their immediate surroundings. When trouble swirls, you will often find them deeply immersed in building Lego or in a sticker book.
Actually, it’s harder to know what to do as an adult. After a certain point, listening to 24-hour rolling news just starts to feed anxiety. Yes, I want to be informed. But what can I do about it? Nothing.
And yet carrying on normal life with concerns about what to cook for supper and ordering dahlia bulbs seems somehow callous. Having a manicure yesterday felt like the ultimate triviality.
On the other hand, at least I have nice nails as the world order crumbles. And there’s quite a lot to be said for that.
Bound once again in Soviet chains
MY JEWISH grandmother fled what is now Ukraine in the early 20th Century. Revisiting the city of her birth, Zhytomyr, some two hours from Kyiv, a couple of years back was fascinating. Many elements of Soviet austerity were still visible, but the place had been enriched by freedom and optimism. How ghastly to see all that being shattered and its citizens fleeing once again.
Stars with much to be happy about
MAYBE I’m only noticing because they’re in my age bracket now, but how many older actresses are aceing it with incredible performances on both the big and small screens? This year’s Bafta nominees include 60-yearold Joanna Scanlan, up for best actress for her portrayal of a white English Muslim convert in After Love. Claire Rushbrook, 50, is the female lead in the moving romance Ali & Ava, which is shortlisted for Outstanding British Film. Olivia Colman, 48 (always nominated everywhere for everything), has another Oscar in her sights for playing conflicted mother Lena in The Lost Daughter. And Helen Mirren, 76, the poster girl for silver Susies, is receiving a Lifetime Achievement award from the Screen Actors Guild.
There are so many others, including the excellent Harriet Walter, 71 – rarely off the small screen as an excruciatingly chilling mother, most recently in Succession and This Is Going To Hurt. Why, though, are these characters never written as someone we might want to be?
There are many aspirational younger female lead characters, but older actresses seem to be cast as troubled, manipulative, lonely or downtrodden. They have terrible relationships with their children and are frequently disappointed in what life has brought them.
Of course, flawed characters are box office. But all the same, I’d love to see an older female play a central role where she not only gets into all kind of scrapes and has her own conflicts and drama, but is also attractive, clever, confident – and, dare I say it, occasionally happy.
Emily, you’ll soon miss the spotlight
IN A recent interview, Justin Webb, of Radio 4’s Today programme, made the excellent point that podcasts, popular as they are, lack the jeopardy of live radio. As Emily Maitlis defects from the BBC’s Newsnight for a lucrative podcast deal with LBC radio, I imagine she will soon be craving that rush of jeopardy and an onscreen presence to show off her glamorous style.
Watch out for Harris, our new McQueen
YOU may not have heard the name Harris Reed before, but I predict you will be hearing it a lot more.
The young British-American designer follows talents like John Galliano and Alexander McQueen as one of those theatrical fashion visionaries who flourish in London. During London Fashion Week, his 60 Years A Queen show placed him high on the league table of the top new talent. It was a display of gender-bending fabulousness.
If you’re looking for tips for what to wear next autumn, I’m afraid you won’t find much among his ruffs, glam rock platforms, masks, headdresses and exaggeratedly elongated silhouettes. But the same was true for many of Reed’s predecessors who showcased unwearable catwalk styles, and they ultimately ended up designing for the most influential and financially successful fashion houses.
Upgrade that upset the Apple cart
I FINALLY indulged in a new iPad last week and it’s pure joy. Everything uploads quickly and the screen is bigger, brighter and, importantly, squeaky clean rather than smudged and scratched.
Now, though, my iPhone and MacBook Air seem even more slow and slovenly than they did before.
Replacing tech is like painting only one room in your house. It’s wonderfully bright and new, but casts a sharply contrasting light on the rest of the place, making it look sad and in need of repair.