QUOTES of the week

‘Nobody looks like Hugh Grant – not even Hugh Grant, who looks increasingly like Sir Ian McKellen on a bad day.’

Notting Hill director Richard Curtis says foreigners are always disappointed when they visit England.

‘If offenders were garrotted with their own intestines, there’d be fewer of them.’

MP Sir Desmond Swayne’s

novel way to tackle flytipping.

‘You post something stupid when you’re 19 and you pay for it when you’re 35, and you pay for it forever.’

Archbishop of Canterbury

Justin Welby hits out at the absence of forgiveness on social media.

‘I think it is bad for morale, bad for learning. You don’t learn sitting at home in your pyjamas in front of a Mac.’

Lord Sugar gives his view on working from home as The Apprentice launches again.

‘Elmo is just checking in! How is everybody doing?’ Elmo the Muppet’s innocent question on Twitter/X before he was deluged by thousands of users sharing their despair.

‘I think Nicola Sturgeon could cry from one eye if she wanted to.’

Scotland Secretary Alister Jack does not believe the former First Minister’s evidence to the Covid Inquiry.

‘It’s all mine, I just had it shifted about.’

Strictly judge Anton Du Beke reveals his hair transplant.

‘I don’t see how helping people die improves life as we know it.’

Punk poet John Cooper Clarke speaks out against assisted dying.

‘I always felt that if Chris was still around, Robin would still be alive.’

Glenn Close talks of the friendship between Robin Williams and Christopher Reeve and says if he hadn’t died in 2004, he would have pulled Williams out of his depression.

‘There’s no way to feel sad when you know you’re this blessed.’

Barbie star Margot Robbie

breaks her silence at being snubbed for an Oscar nomination.