The truth about the X factor
Johnny Grimond: Words and Stuff
Lock down and chuck out. If that has been your motto recently, or possibly an order you have received, you might consider tidying up the alphabet as well as your sock drawer. Start, perhaps, with one of those things that aren’t strictly necessary and you don’t often use: the letter x, for example.
Of all the letters in the alphabet, only j, q and z are used less frequently than x. We might not miss it much if were gone. After all, some languages, even some using the Latin script, do fine without it. X occurs in a few Italian names, such as Craxi, and crops up in borrowed words such as xenofobia and extraterrèstre, but on the whole Italian gives it the bird.
English could do the same. In most words spelt with an x, you could use ks instead. It would take a bit of time getting used to coksing and boksing, ekspressing yourself in heksameters, or getting ekscited about spotting a galaksy of wakswings. It certainly wouldn’t go down well with some people if they had to sign their letters Aleksandra – rather Russian – or, worse, Maks. And ks doesn’t always work as a substitute: would you want to go on a luksury holiday? Xerxes would become Zerkses.
Other names would have to be reconsidered. Generation X might have to become Generation Middle, between the Boomers and the Millennials. The Chicago White Sox and the Boston Red Sox might have to adopt more conventional spelling. And Elon Musk, who runs Space X, might want to think again about naming his son X Æ A-xii.
Despite the problems, though, expelling x from the alphabet would be doable. But would it be wise? X is paradoxical: though relatively little used in words, it is often used as a symbol, more often perhaps than any other letter. X gives us The X Factor, The X-files and ten in Roman numerals. The illiterate use it for their signatures. ‘My uncle out in Texas/ Can’t even write his name/ He signs his cheques with xs/ But they cash ’em just the same.’
X also follows signatures as a symbol of innocent love, sometimes childish, sometimes romantic. ‘A lotta kisses on the bottom, / I’ll be glad I got ’em.’ Strangely, it is as well the symbol of lustful, forbidden love: X is for sex.
The mysterious like it too. For anyone seeking obscurity, whether bashful would-be Valentine, frightened whistleblower or ruthless extortionist, X provides the mask of anonymity. It is, in fact, the foremost symbol for the unknown, especially the unknown variable. In this role, x is spattered across every book of algebra ever written.
Lately, another role for X has been in the news, its part in our genetic make-up. When it comes to resisting COVID-19, it turns out, men are the weaker sex because they have only one X chromosome, whereas women have two. One X chromosome has about 10,000 genes, many of which help build the immune system. The Y chromosome carried by men has about 60, and most of those are kept busy with sex.
So x is much more useful than first sight would suggest. The same goes for my sock drawer, I think. You never know when things will come in handy. No decluttering for me.