Motoring

THE END OF THE ROAD

‘Retirement taught me what I had long suspected,’ my friend said. ‘People have jobs to avoid work.’

There’s truth in the old saw, with the added complication that flexible retirement means we also have to decide when the axe should fall.

It’s the same with cars – when do you retire them? When they get doddery? When you’re bored and crave novelty? When they’re out of fashion? When they’re losing too much value? When the seat colour no longer matches your smart new outfit?

Of course, it’s easier to retire your car than your staff or yourself. We do it more often – the average age of cars on British roads is about nine years (17 in this household) and the average age at scrapping is about 14.

No manufacturer ever tells you a car is for life. If you don’t change your car frequently, they’re out of business.

Although cars, like ships and planes, aren’t designed to last for life, they can be made to. The Boeing B-52 Stratofortress bomber first flew for the US Air Force in 1952; the last was built in 1962. Yet they’re still flying and are about to get upgrades that will keep them in the air until they’re a century old.

Ditto the Douglas DC-3 commercial load-lugger, due its centenary in 2036. Given the flourishing state of the classic-car market, in 2048 we’ll also be wishing a happy 100th to the Morris Minor and the Land Rover, both of which are regularly renovated to almost new.

We usually get rid of cars for economic reasons, or so we tell ourselves.

Those who can afford it buy a car new, keep it for two or three years or until the warranty expires, and then trade it in for a newer model. They take a hit on depreciation, but not as much as if they would if they kept it a few years longer.

Meanwhile, they have (or should have) reliable motoring with no worries about costly maintenance.

Most buyers, however, buy used – and many keep what they’ve bought until it’s beyond economic repair.

However, it’s often cheaper to repair than to change, since the cost of changing is nearly always greater than you think.

You tell yourself you’re getting something better and mostly you are, but not invariably. Another reason for early automotive retirement is that when cars break down, as they must eventually, you lose faith in them.

The 2008 financial crisis prolonged the average life of UK cars because fewer people bought new, as is happening now with COVID. Another factor is that computer-controlled, modern cars are generally more reliable than old ones; and their bodies don’t rust as they used to. Thus they should last longer, pushing the average age up.

However, when they do go wrong, they often go wrong big-time. New computers, engines and transmissions cost more than the car is worth, pushing the average age down again.

Then there’s the seven-year-itch factor – more like three- or four- with cars.

There’s nothing wrong with your ten-year-old – properly maintained, it’s probably good for another ten years – but there’s an interest-free loan offered on a four-year-old down the road and you persuade yourself that you need more or less boot space. Anyway, it’s a hybrid and therefore (theoretically) better for the environment than your old gas-guzzler. Makes you feel better.

And that – the feel factor – is often what retiring our four-wheeled friends is really all about. It’s easier than retiring each other and because we can, we do. So, if you can afford it and it gives you pleasure, why not?

It’s a buyer’s market just now.