The Press and Journal (Aberdeen and Aberdeenshire)
I won’t let cancer define me, says Emily
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You’d be forgiven for not having heard of Emily Findlay because, from the outside at least, she appears like any other young person leading her life in Aberdeen. The anonymity the city has granted her is precious, for it is certainly not on offer in her home village on Orkney.
Aside from the fact that it is impossible to live undetected in a small community, 23-year-old Emily is almost considered public property,
Outside of a tight-knit circle of protective friends and family, she is simply known as cancer girl.
“I’m the girl who has cancer; it has almost been that way for as long as I can remember,” she said.
Emily was diagnosed with neuroblastoma when she was 14 years old, having felt unwell in the months previously.
Doctors initially thought that following treatment she would go into remission and resume a life not dictated by gruelling chemotherapy at Aberdeen Royal Infirmary.
Emily has never known remission, though.
She has had to come to terms with the fact that the best she can hope for is that her condition remains stable, with expected periods of relapse and yet more treatment.
She does not have the luxury of planning for the future or imagining a life where she can grow old.
Doom and gloom simply isn’t part of her vocabulary, though.
Emily believes that living with what she refers to as a “chronic illness” has actually enriched her life.
“I don’t sit around all day planning my funeral and I don’t see this as a terminal illness,” she said.
“It’s a chronic disease and I don’t plan on going anywhere for years and years.
“I was so young when I was diagnosed so I think my outlook is different to someone who is diagnosed later in life.
“I never got the chance to leave home or go to university without cancer in the background.
“It’s not something I dwell on, I don’t sit here thinking life is unfair.
“I’m human, though, and I envy people the luxury of been able to plan.
“Whether that’s having children, for example, I don’t look far ahead because I don’t know what the future holds.”
Emily initially received chemotherapy before relapsing for the first time.
She then underwent antibody therapy, a treatment which almost killed her.
“That’s the only time I’ve told my mum that I just wanted the pain to stop,” she said.
“I don’t think many people are aware of the fact that sometimes it’s not the cancer that kills you.
“It’s the treatment itself because it’s that aggressive.”
Emily underwent radiotherapy earlier this year following her second relapse and her condition is currently stable.
Having raised thousands of pounds for charity, she was also recently awarded a British Empire Medal and will join other recipients at Buckingham Palace with the Queen next year.
The medal was awarded on her 23rd birthday and was presented by the Lord Lieutenant of Orkney.
“I’m not sure what I’ve done to deserve it but it’s pretty amazing,” she said.
“I think it would be easy to think ‘isn’t this diagnosis just awful’ but I wouldn’t get up in the morning if I thought that way.
“You don’t come to terms with it as such
but you learn to live with and carve out the very best life possible.
“I’ve met amazing people through events such as Courage on the Catwalk and Maggie’s, which supports people with cancer in Aberdeen.
“I was treated on the children’s ward and there’s only so much support you can give each other when everyone is so young.
“There’s a wonderful group of women at Maggie’s just now and I go every Wednesday.
“The people I’ve met and the events I’ve been involved with because of my diagnosis, in that respect, cancer has enriched my life.”
Emily has never hesitated in her determination to make the best of things, but admits her diagnosis can make planning ahead difficult.
“I take every opportunity and in some aspects it has made me live for the moment and take chances,” she said.
“I can hold back, though.
“My boyfriend wanted to book a holiday for February and I don’t feel like I have the luxury of doing that.
“I have scans in January and I don’t know what the outcome will be.”
Emily is very open about her condition and gave her boyfriend the facts on their very first date.
The couple now live together but Emily believes not everyone is so unfazed by her condition.
“I’ve never felt awkward about telling people that I have cancer,” she said.
“It can be strange because people sometimes flock around you.
“I found this when I was having treatment and I think it’s because people are attracted to the drama of it all.
“They want to be able to say they know me and pass on updates when I’m having treatment.
“There’s nothing wrong with that as such, it’s human nature in a way.
“But I don’t want to be known as cancer girl. “I just want to be a normal 23-year-old.”