The Press and Journal (Aberdeen and Aberdeenshire)
STOP THE WORLD, I WANT TO GET OFF
Do you find yourself groaning when you turn on the news? Is it happening more and more this year? Have you had enough?
I’m not depressed or drained with my own individual life, but I am depressed and drained by society and the current state of it.
When is the last time you shook a hand or, heaven forbid, hugged someone? I’ve been taking stock of 2020, and it won’t go down as a nostalgic year, that’s for sure.
First up, of course, is the coronavirus. This is not a column knocking advice or belittling anyone who has been affected by this virus, I’m just drained by it being on every news channel, and in every paper. We seem to talk of nothing else, 24/7. It’s too much. Stop the world, I want to get off.
Can you remember February? It was normal and we could live our lives. But we were then confined inside for numerous weeks, only allowed out to queue outside supermarkets. Finally, we were allowed out proper, but only within a five-mile radius. Then came in these awful masks, then new lockdowns, our schools are a flippin’ mess, businesses closed and jobs lost in every sector. Economic disaster.
I said in March that I wasn’t convinced in shutting down the entire economy. On that point, 1.5 million people died from highly contagious TB in 2018 – we didn’t shut down the world economy for that though.
I agree that measures had to be taken, and I abided by them, but it’s September now and many families are suffering economically. It’s also been reported that many more have died of cancer and heart problems because they were too scared to go to hospital for check-ups and/or had examinations postponed.
I also said in my very first column on the virus that fear and paranoia were infectious. How true. Even last month, back home, I had a woman walking towards me step on to the road and go round a parked car in order to avoid the apparently diseased me walking down the street and infecting her.
Another I met in a forest declined to pat my dog, telling me that she normally would, but I could have the virus, have passed it on to the dog’s fur, then she could get it.
Social distancing, yes. Over-reaction, fear and paranoia, no.
Then I go home, turn on the TV and am told for the millionth time that day to wash my hands. Stop the world, I want to get off.
I’m starting to wonder, was there ever a time before corona? Was there ever anything before corona? Yes, of course – Brexit! Brexit was something that we talked about 24/7 for ages, and it got so bad I wrote a column titled “toxic and tribal”. What happened to Brexit? Don’t worry, with the clock ticking towards December 31 regarding deal or no deal, it’s back in the news.
Britain and the EU is a subject I’ve been passionate about for 27 years, however with regard to the scaremongering and vile comments that were thrown around like confetti the last year, it now joins corona on my groan list. Stop the world, I want to get off.
If the idea of all that Brexit argument starting up again doesn’t make you want to pull the duvet over your head, don’t worry, there will probably be another Scottish referendum soon. And how ugly is that going to get? Stop the world, I want to get off.
Are you worried, concerned, fed up with being unsure what you can and cannot say? You’re not alone. Do black lives matter? Ridiculous question, of course they do, but we are not America, we have nothing like the race issues they have there, thankfully.
Do I approve of slavery? No, no one does. However, neither do I approve of angry groups vandalising and tearing down statues. And what is worse, the British police initially stood by and watched. The police were scared to intervene. If I, with a shaved head, tried to topple a Winston Churchill statue, for example, I would be arrested on the spot, and rightly so.
We cannot and should not try to erase our past. Celebrate the good and learn from the bad. I wrote a column on it last year, “should we apologise for our colonial past?” What a can of worms that was.
I’ve seen clips online of people being shouted and screamed at for not taking a knee, not pumping their fists in the air and shouting black lives matter. What a tragic situation when just because you don’t do what others do, you are classed as racist, or homophobic.
And just because you don’t want to bring what’s left of our economy to its knees by blockading roads and sabotaging newspapers being printed, you don’t care about the environment, according to Extinction Rebellion. Stop the world, I want to get off.
The BLM groups totally get my support for speaking up against racism and violence against black people, but this group is morphing into a dangerous anti-capitalist force.
It seems right now, with so many social issues, if you are not as angry as whatever group is in question, don’t do as they do, then you’re against them. Nonsense.
We really are heading down a very slippery slope, we are sleepwalking into a very dangerous world.
I love the cartoon The Simpsons. I was saddened but not surprised to hear that the white actor who voices Apu, the Indian immigrant shopkeeper, says he will no longer do it, due to people being offended by how the obviously stereotypical character is portrayed. But the thing is, every Simpsons character is stereotypical, that’s the whole point.
Take groundskeeper Willie. An angry Scotsman, ginger hair, sometimes wears a kilt, he can be verbally and physically aggressive, often drunk, hates kids and teachers, constantly moaning about the world. But hang on, why don’t we ban Willie also? I see no one asking for that. Why is Apu offensive and Willie is not? For the record, I am Scottish and Willie is my favourite character, he is hilarious.
Being offended at something is a human emotion, a feeling we get. Problem is though, feelings are not collective, they are individual things. What may upset me, may not upset or offend you and vice versa. So, when someone gets so angry and demands some words of a song be banned, sorry, tough luck, you’re entitled to your opinion, but we can’t just ban something because you don’t like it. But this is where we are heading, I see it every single day. It’s been getting worse over the years, but it’s definitely accelerated in 2020. It’s not been a great year for society, has it?
But what wins the current gold medal? No competition, it goes to the report I heard on Radio 4 last week. Doctors are being told not to call obese patients “chubby”, apparently it’s offensive.
“Oh, for goodness sake!” or words to that effect, I shouted at the radio, before quickly turning it off and going outside.
Is there ever anything good or positive on the news these days? I’m struggling to find any. Oh, and just wait for the November budget – big tax increases coming…
So, keep your mouth shut basically; never, ever admit that you once laughed watching It Ain’t Half Hot Mum; don’t ever say anything good about British history or the devil incarnate that is now Churchill; enjoy the nasty shouting that’s about to start again with neverendums; forget about ever greeting a friend in the street again with a hug; strap that muzzle on; keep two metres apart and wash your hands with gel until they are raw. Will we ever get back to normality?
No, I fear that this, what we have now, is the new normality.
Stop the world, I want to get off.
WHY DON’T WE BAN WILLIE ALSO? I SEE NO ONE ASKING FOR THAT. WHY IS APU OFFENSIVE AND WILLIE IS NOT?