How do I help my child transition to big school?

Support: There are steps parents can take to ensure a son or daughter moves smoothly over to secondary education

Parents of children born in 2011 and early 2012 can be forgiven for feeling trepidation at the moment, ahead of their child’s transition to secondary school.

The step up to the “big school” is a big deal for a child, but often an equally big deal for their anxious parents.

How can we help our child during the move from primary to secondary, arguably the biggest “jump” of their young lives thus far?

More than a third of children (36%) had a positive experience of moving to secondary school last year, according to a recent Scottish Government study.

However, a notable minority (22%) had a negative transition experience.

Non-profit organisations, charities and experts largely agree that more needs to be done to help pupils transition to secondary school.

How do primary schools prepare their leavers for the next stage of their educational journey, and how can parents help?

The majority of P7 children will be going to their zoned secondary school.

Between now and the end of the school year, schools have arranged a series of transition events to make sure pupils are well prepared for the step up.

These include question and answer sessions with current S1 pupils, workshops, parent information evenings and transition days, when children will visit their new school for a few days, giving them some prior experience of their classmates and some of the subjects they will be studying.

Chartered psychologist Professor Ewan Gillon is clinical director of First Psychology, which has clinics in Aberdeen and Inverness.

He said the most important thing, from a practical perspective, is to help your child prepare for and visualise the logistical steps of the new school day.

Most schools will hold transitional visits, although it pays to practise travelling the route to school.

He added: “Making sure things will go smoothly on the first day, that the uniform fits and so on, is also important just to make sure there aren’t specific ‘triggers’ that could create unnecessary upset in the rush to get to school on the first morning.”

This technique of “living” that first day beforehand is something Dr Ruth Woods concurs with. She is a psychology lecturer at Robert Gordon University (RGU) in Aberdeen, specialising in children.

“Practice making the journey to school and go through the logistics of the school day, such as where to get lunch, store possessions, and the need to move between classrooms for lessons,” she said.

Parents and children will feel anxiety ahead of, and during, the transition. This is quite natural, and the key is not to overreact to those feelings.

“It is a big step, and children will naturally feel some anxiety about moving from primary to secondary school,” said Prof Gillon.

“Parents will of course experience this too. The most important thing is not to overreact and worry about things that may or may not happen.”

With secondary school comes more autonomy. Children find themselves taking more decisions about themselves and their day.

With this in mind, helping your child develop more autonomy in the run-up to the transition will help them when the big day comes.

“Research has found that children whose parents help them develop autonomy tend to cope better with transitions, with better self-esteem and fewer mental health problems,” said Dr Woods.

And Prof Gillon stressed the importance of helping our children grow up.

He added: “Trusting them to do small things, and increasing the level of autonomy they have in their lives is important, though this needs to be counterbalanced with keeping them safe and making sure they make choices appropriate to their age.”

Going from being the oldest at primary school, to the youngest at secondary school, can be a “real shock”, said Prof Gillon.

And Dr Woods spoke of the stress that can come from undergoing change, often on multiple fronts, at a young age.

But despite the trepidation, it is important to remember that your child growing up is, ultimately, a positive thing.

Prof Gillon concluded: “Transitioning from primary to secondary school is a huge step for children.

“But it is part of them fulfilling their potential and growing up, which is a wonderful and exciting process.”

The most important thing is not to overreact and worry

ALL CHANGE: A father helping his son put on a tie for his first day at secondary school.