HOW FRANK BRUNO HELPED HIGHLAND STAR FIGHT HIS DEMONS

Sport: Gold medalist admits he didn’t want to live after hitting rock bottom

One of Scotland’s bravest sporting heroes today admitted that he got so low that he thought of taking his own life.

Among the people who helped paralympian gold medalist Dave Smith understand his “dark places” was ex-boxer Frank Bruno - who has famously battled his own demons.

Now Mr Smith, from Aviemore, is to represent Great Britain again in his first major race since fighting cancer for the third time.

“I really suffered more this time – I suffered very badly mentally”

He is to take part in a 20km time trial at the UCI Para-Cyling Road World Cup in Ostend, Belgium, next month.

Dave said he still has the all clear after an MRI scan showed no sign of a tumour that had came perilously close to threatening to crush his spinal cord.

In 2016, the 39-year-old had surgery to remove the tumour close to his spine. Friends and supporters raised around £10,000 to pay for his medical treatment.

But what they did not know was that Dave was battling severe depression.

“It got so low that I lay in a shower thinking about taking my own life,” said Dave yesterday.

“To make it back this time means more than the last time. I really suffered more this time – I suffered very badly mentally.

“I went through a process of denial then depression. Eventually I went and saw a psychologist who I still see every week.

“I was so rock bottom I could not live any more. But I told myself to keep going – not to be defeated by this. It was just another battle and I had good friends.

“I was in a dark place, a real dark place.

“My biggest fear was that I was not living – my whole world became about spinal injuries. I wanted it to be about living and inspiring people.”

Mr Smith attended a sporting lunch and sat next to former WBC Heavyweight Champion boxer Bruno, who was sectioned three times after struggling with bipolar disorder following his retirement over 20 years ago. “He’s obviously had his own mental health battles and we talked about the problems. He said ‘be kind to yourself ’ and how important is the support of friends and family. It was good advice,” said Dave.

“Depression is such a under reported thing in sport. I’m not ashamed to say I suffered and did not realise what I was going through at the time.”

He was also inspired by Graham Obree - nicknamed The Flying Scotsman - who has also opened up about his own struggles with depression.

HONEST: Paralympic gold medal winner Dave Smith is representing Great Britain again after his battle with severe depression