I’m fine with the tyranny of lockdown

If you work in the hospitality, travel or entertainment industries or have lost your job due to coronavirus, then you should stop reading now. I have to warn you that this column displays shameful selfishness.

It is only for those of you who, by luck rather than judgment, made it through the pandemic with your jobs intact. However, I have had secret chats with so many people who share the same sentiment as me about this subject that I’m just going to put it out there.

The truth is, I enjoyed lockdown and I’m enjoying having my freedom restricted. There, I said it. I know it’s not helpful but I have realised that I’m actually fine with tyranny. I gave up my rights and freedoms and allowed the government to dictate how I lived my life... and I liked it.

Oh, the relief of not having to rush around fulfilling obligations. Weekends organising social events have disappeared in favour of long walks with the dog. Rushing around from kids’ swimming classes to after- school rugby have been replaced by quiet evenings with (too much) wine.

Fo r a while the daily commute disappeared and was replaced by a healthy balance in my bank account as the petrol money stacked up and there was nowhere to go instead to spend it.

Meanwhile my aged car sailed through its MoT because it had barely been used. Birthday parties were not allowed, along with most social events, saving not only money, but time and energy too.

Finally I understand my father, whose idea of hell is the whole family coming up the garden path. Oh the joys of being a boring recluse.

How hard I worked to have a career but when lockdown forced me into the drudgery of being a housewife, I realised it is actually quite fulfilling.

I reconnected with my children and had the opportunity to identify some of the things that were going wrong in my teenager’s life. I think I enjoyed “craft time” more than they did.

Daily life settled into a pleasing routine of home schooling, Horrible Histories and bicycle rides on empty roads. When the shops were closed, I liked the challenge of having to make do and mend.

I’ve enjoyed the changes around me too. Instead of rushing off to the beach on a hot day, the kids swam in a nearby loch. They had the whole thing to themselves apart from a few trout and eels (which I didn’t tell them about).

Everyone is happy. Empty motorways make long journeys enjoyable again. The skies are clear and quiet. No more guilt about the environment. Our family’s carbon emissions have plummeted and, as a result of the calmer home life, I haven’t felt the need for a foreign holiday. After all, my garden has never looked better.

We all strive for a better work-life balance and I have written before about the science of “happiness”.

Plenty of research has pinpointed what makes us happy: it is not money, holidays, climbing the career ladder or a busy social life. It’s a short commute, a happy home life and the feeling that our lives are worthwhile.

Governments monitor happiness levels in order to measure their performance. Who’d have thought that all we needed was a healthy dose of dictatorship?

We are facing another long, difficult winter. These social restrictions will certainly rule out Halloween, probably cover Christmas and will make New Year parties impossible. Let’s hope so.

No rushing around juggling relations and making sure I don’t reuse the same gift bag my sister-in-law gave me last year.

Definitely no need to worry about visitors and a stash of emergency presents. Even when we stay in for New Year, we can rest easy that everyone’s social media feeds will be equally boring. Instead, the most I have to organise is a Zoom call. What a joy.

With a bit of luck this might even last into the spring, releasing me from the burden of organising my son’s birthday party and even my partner’s 50th. I don’t even need to feel guilty since I can blame either the government, China or just Darwinian evolution.

Am I pining for a return to normal life? Considering all of the above... yes, of course, for the sake of all those who have suffered. However, when we get back to normal, please let it not be too normal.

When we get back to normal, please let it not be too normal