Painting chilling picture of future as AI debate rages

Technology: As a warning is issued over artificial intelligence, commuters are left wishing for a formula to solve the city’s multi-roadworks headache

You wait ages for an existential crisis and then three come along at once. Nukes and climate change were the biggies until Tuesday when it was announced artificial intelligence poses a threat to humanity.

It makes a change from humanity posing a threat to humanity so at least there’s some novelty value.

A warning was signed by 350 executives and scientists, including ‘godfathers of AI’ Geoffrey Hinton and Yoshua Bengio, who won a Turing Award for their work on neural networks.

RISKS OF AI

Their one-sentence statement read: “Mitigating the risk of extinction from AI should be a global priority alongside other societal-scale risks, such as pandemics and nuclear war.”

Well I could have told them that.

In fact, I’m sure I did. 1987, Aberdeen University Student’s Union, I distinctly remember saying to a guy in my year who was studying Artificial Intelligence: “Isn’t that dangerous? Will it mean robots take over the world? Is that a pint of snakebite?”

I wonder where he is now? Is he one of the 350 signatories? If I could go back to 1987 I’d kick him in the shins or persuade him to switch to History of Art, whatever gets the job done.

AI-DA ARTWORK

This week Ai-da, the world’s first humanoid robot, had an art exhibition at the London Design Biennale.

AI poses a threat to jobs so I may retrain as a bridge repair contractor because they are in high demand. That’s why Aberdeen’s major roadworks are happening all at once.

The council revealed only two specialist contractors expressed an interest in fixing the King George VI Bridge asap and so it was forced to fit their schedules.

Sweltering in traffic is a minor inconvenience compared to the wildfire in the Highlands which became the biggest blaze ever recorded in the UK.

Wild camping is believed to have started the fire, which covered an area three times the size of Inverness and could be seen from space.

Simon McLaughlin, pictured inset, site manager of Corrimony RSPB, said: “It’s a mini version of a war. You’re fighting something unforgiving and thinking about people, properties, wildlife and habitats.”

GHOST ORCHIDS

Environment and war was linked in a more positive story when an endangered Florida Ghost Orchid blossomed at the Royal Botanic Gardens in Kew.

The population drastically declined when its host trees, bald cypresses, were logged to make aircraft carrier decks in the Second World War.

Near Edinburgh, a company called UNDO secured £12 million to scale up “rock weathering”, where tiny pieces of basalt remove carbon dioxide from the atmosphere and help cool down the planet.

FOOTBALL TO MUSIC

In other exciting rock news, Eric Cantona launched a music career and will be touring the UK and Europe, his debut single The Friends We Lost gaining rave reviews.

The Manchester United legend taught himself guitar during lockdown, naturellement.

I’d buy a ticket to see Le Roi but not for Royal Blood, after singer Mike Kerr branded the crowd “pathetic” at BBC Radio 1’s Big Weekend in Dundee.

He was upset no-one knew the words, which was also the problem in Inverness where street name translations have been rubbished by Gaelic speakers. Highland Council said the signs with rough translations are not the final version after critics branded the efforts “lazy to the extreme” and “disrespectful”.

Getting an A for effort is ferry network CMAL which launched a Gaelic ‘toolkit’ for staff to learn the language.

Business support officer Chris Fisher realised how much easier his job would be if he learned basic Gaelic and has been “hooked ever since”.

LIFE IN MARS

Mars is tackling environmental issues one bite a time by wrapping its chocolate bars in recyclable paper. If customers aren’t completely satisfied they can get a refund which, given where we are with the cost of living, might be a mistake. A Co-op in London has put empty “display only” coffee jars on its shelves to deter shoplifters as 200g of Kenco instant reached £10.50.

I don’t know if New Zealand’s national airline is thinking what I’m thinking regarding the Mars bar refunds, but it has announced it will be weighing passengers before they board its flights.

Only two specialist contractors expressed an interest

PICTURE PERFECT? Ai-da the robot beside her self portrait during a photo call for the London Design Biennale.