Waspish words

It wouldn’t be the silly season without rubbish about people being terrorised by non-existent plagues of wasps, twice normal size, with stings that can kill and carrying a 12 000 lb bomb-load.

It also wouldn’t be the silly season without some academic jumping to their defence as “misunderstood”. Anyone who has witnessed wasps picking captured insects from a spider’s web (or the spider itself ) or seen a hive being attacked by wasp swarms will appreciate that these thoroughly nasty insects are of no more natural benefit than cuckoos.

Let’s get the facts straight: social wasp populations (the ones we all hate) have crashed in the last five years, and to no one’s surprise the world hasn’t ended. Instead our spider and honey bee populations (which suffer appalling attrition rates from them, being easier prey than disease-carrying flies on the wing) have partially recovered – and we’ve been able to enjoy a peaceful summer without their ominous droning buzz every minute.

If the day ever comes that every last social wasp in Britain is declared extinct, HM the Queen should declare a public holiday on which we can all enjoy our jam outdoors in peace (or in Scotland, “in piece”).

MARK BOYLE Linn Park Gardens Johnstone, Renfrewshire