Montenegro are lambs to slaughter as brutal England show no mercy
● But empty spaces at Wembley show public disinterest as FA celebrate 1,000th international
Party tricks, fancy flicks and a hatful of goals made sure England had the party they desired to mark their 1,000th game as they clinched qualification for Euro 2020. Cynics may argue that Montenegro were hand-picked to entertain the kids in the audience such was the ease of victory.
The seven goals scored, including a hat-trick by Harry Kane, took England’s total to 33 for the campaign at an average nudging five per match.
Nostalgia for the 1,000th game did not connect with the public in the same way as with the curators at the FA, as the empty spaces in Wembley’s upper tiers suggested.
Gareth Southgate again resisted the lure of James Maddison, the Leicester City linchpin who is making the King Power shiver. The manager re-instated Mason Mount, dropped after the defeat by the Czech Republic and gave the fully restored Alex Oxlade-chamberlain his first start since March last year.
The central bolt in midfield was Harry Winks, whose excellent display in Bulgaria went rather under reported, engulfed like all else by the racism storm.
This was something of free ride for Montenegro, a trip to one of the great stadiums of the world. With only three points to England’s 15 it was for them something to be enjoyed, at least until Oxladechamberlain rammed England ahead in the 11th minute with a tasty, drilled finish.
Skipper Kane doubled the account seven minutes later with a beautifully-cushioned header. The supplier for both goals was Ben Chillwell, who seems to have made the leftback berth his own. It was no surprise that England’s third goal six minutes later, another set-piece header by Kane, was placed on his napper by that same, unerring left peg.
Montenegro are not a reliable guide, of course. But the sense of a genuine power gathering in this England side is real enough. There were times well remembered by past grandees seated in the stands when England would be too easily embarassed by eastern European technicians no matter how light on scale and prestige.
Marcus Rashford helped himself to the fourth, belting a rebound into the roof of the net with only half an hour on the clock. Kane’s hat-trick followed shortly, turning in a cross from Trent Alexander-arnold. The England scoring rate at this point was roughly a goal every seven minutes.
More significantly on a night of statistical celebration was Kane’s move to sixth alone in the all-time England scorers audit on 31 goals, one ahead of Alan Shearer, Nat Lofthouse and Tom Finney. Only Wayne Rooney (53), Bobby Charlton (49), Gary Lineker (48), Jimmy Greaves (44) and Michael Owen (40) stand above Kane.
It beggars belief that England almost forgot how to play only two matches ago in Prague. Events in Bulgaria buried the awfulness of that display, though not in the memory of Southgate, who, before the Raheem Sterling drama erupted, dropped oblique references to it as if compelled to process it further. Perhaps there is no need now.
England had the ball in the net a sixth time ten minutes into the second half, the ball pinged about at bewildering pace before being tapped over the line by Mount. In his eagerness to finish the move Mount’s momentum carried him one step beyond the last defender. No goal.
Southgate chose this moment to make Maddison the 1,245th player to represent England. It was like walking out to bat with 500 on the board to face a barrage of long hops and half volleys.
Montenegro’s ambition after the break extended no further than not conceding. They held out for a full 20 minutes, and when it came, the sixth goal had some historical significance since it was delivered by Montenegro’s Aleksander Sofrinac, taking the number of own goals scored in the service of England to 53, the same number as Rooney. .
If England had a fault it was over indulgence, a bit like eating all the Maltesers before the film has started. That said the younger members of the audience seemed to appreciate the repeated attempts by England to dribble their way to heaven as if contesting this fixture on Fifa. For the record, Tammy Abraham scored the seventh.