Why we are asking total strangers to pay for our IVF BABY
Couple devastated by miscarriage take to the net to fund treatment
THE road to parenthood is an intimate struggle, and couples affected by the agony of infertility often remain silent. But when nursery worker Lianne Johnson suffered a miscarriage after becoming pregnant through IVF, she was driven to take an extraordinary step: appealing to strangers to donate the thousands of pounds necessary to fund a second course of treatment.
‘It was a pregnancy we’d hoped for and waited so long for,’ Lianne, 32, says. ‘I’d worked in childcare for more than ten years, but going back the nursery and seeing the children walk and talk for the first time – milestones that we should have been reaching with our own child but now never would – just broke my heart.’
The devastation suffered by Lianne and her husband Alan was complete when they learned their local NHS group in Northamptonshire would fund only one round of IVF. It has driven them into the arms of crowdfunding, a phenomenon which began in the US and allows people to raise money by appealing over the internet.
Lianne says: ‘Alan had seen someone crowdfunding for a stag do and thought it could work for us.
‘I was emotional, but I knew that if we wanted another go at having a baby, which we desperately did, this was our only chance.’
Websites such as Gofundme and Kickstarter typically host campaigns for everything from charity climbs to university fees.
But as Government health budgets tighten, the sites are now playing host to people seeking funding for medical and fertility treatment. It is the most public expression of a very private problem.
Lianne is now a waitress in Northamptonshire after feeling unable to carry on at the nursery. She admits that typing out her details and choosing a private wedding picture for the world to see on their ‘Alan & Lianne’s family dream’ crowdfunding page was hard for them. They are trying to raise £10,000.
‘No more than a handful of people even knew the difficulties we’d had in trying to conceive,’ she says. ‘Yet there we were, about to reveal everything to the world. I had to do it – the NHS left us no choice. We were desperate to make this happen.’
The couple are not alone. A growing number of Britons are turning to the internet to bankroll their drive for a family. Over the past 18 months alone, donations to UK-based fertility campaigns have increased by 290 per cent, according to Gofundme. com. It has been fuelled, in part, by the NHS postcode lottery for fertility treatment.
The Government’s rationing body, the National Institute for Health and Care Excellence (NICE), says most women under 40 who have failed to get pregnant after two years of trying should receive up to three rounds of IVF on the NHS.
But some local commissioning groups have failed to implement the guidance, often because of budget restrictions. Many offer just one round of IVF.
Lianne adds: ‘Knowing that we only had one go at IVF, while other people across the country had three tries, made it even worse.’
The couple’s £10,000 target will cover two rounds of IVF with ICSI, an additional procedure commonly used in cases of male infertility which involves injecting sperm directly into the egg. To date they have raised £500, mainly through donations from family and friends.
FELLOW I VF crowdfunders Sian Deville and Kirk Wyatt, from Rochester, Kent, have received donations from strangers. Nursery assistant Sian, 26, had her fallopian tubes removed after two ectopic pregnancies and is unable to conceive naturally. But the couple were turned down for funding by NHS Medway because Kirk has a child from a previous relationship.
Kirk, 34, a dental technician, says: ‘I honestly didn’t expect anyone to donate anything – let alone ten strangers. The NHS may not want to help us but perfect strangers do.’
Nanny Ayda Kay, 40, and her partner John Ball, 60, from West London, need IVF following John’s treatment for cancer.
His sperm is stored ready for a cycle, but Ayda’s age rules her out for any local funding. Their crowdfunding page has raised £1,560 so far.
Ayda says: ‘I know it’s very un-British to hold your cap out, but when the first £50 came in, and from someone I never would have imagined, I was so moved and touched.’
Nicola Bates of IVFyes, which campaigns to end the IVF postcode lottery, says the desperation of couples is understandable.
‘It’s an unfair system and it needs to end,’ she says.
‘Most of it is purely about rationing treatment and has no bearing on the success of an IVF cycle.
‘It’s a shambles, and meanwhile for infertile couples the years tick by and hope of having a family turns to despair.
‘They have paid their taxes expecting to get help and the NHS has slammed the door in their face.’