A wee dram that turned into a crisis

EVENINGS at Clarence House began with the descent of Princess Margaret from her bedroom, made-up and invigorated by the prospect of an evening out with her friends, the Woosterian group of young aristocrats known by the press at the time as ‘the Margaret Set’.

After drinks they would go to a West End theatre and, perhaps a late dinner back at Clarence House which they never thought about until 11 o’clock or so, which meant staff had to serve them at midnight.

Afterwards, the gang would stroll back into the sitting room, brandy and cigars were ordered in quantity, and the Margaret Set let their hair down, kicking off their shoes to dance on the carpets – with staff attending often until three or four in the morning.

Staff, meanwhile, were kept firmly in their place. Princess Diana’s butler, Paul Burrell, claims that, on returning from an engagement, Margaret would touch the television, testing it for warmth, just in case the servants had been watching when her back was turned.

Margaret was always a stickler for order. Every evening, she would check the drinks tray to see everything was in place – particularly a sealed bottle of Malvern water, which she insisted on taking with her whisky

Her footman, David John Payne, realised how strong her insistence on Malvern water was on a weekend visit to the Devon house of Margaret’s cousin, Mrs Ann Rhodes and her husband, Denys.

On the evening of their arrival in Devon, Denys said: ‘What will you have to drink, Ma’am?’

‘Whisky and water,’ came the reply. Rhodes filled a glass with a generous slug of Scotch, then raised a crystal jug of tap water.

‘Instinctively, I pushed forward to warn him,’ Payne wrote. ‘Before I could speak, the Princess said in a voice which stilled all other conversation. “No Denys. Not that. I want WATER in my whisky.”’

The room fell silent. No one could fathom what on earth she was on about. ‘Mr Rhodes was puzzled too. “But this is water, Ma’am.”

‘She looked him up and down and said in her most Royal tones, “That is not water. It is only tap water. John knows what I mean. Fetch my special water immediately, will you?”’

Payne went to the kitchen and returned with a bottle of Malvern from a crate he had brought with him. ‘It was still sealed; Margaret always insisted on this.’ The Princess nodded her head, and turned to her cousin: ‘This, Ann, is water. Now do you see what I mean?’ With a bow, Payne presented the fresh glass to Margaret.

All was well; conversation recommenced. Only now could the other guests be served.