MAXWELL AND PETRIE NOT HELPING THE SFA BY KEEPING KERR

GIVEN the lack of evident progress in his grand plan to humanise Rod Petrie, perhaps SFA chief executive Ian Maxwell should have considered a midweek trial run on Shelley Kerr.

Too late now, of course. Kerr ought to have chucked it as Scotland Women’s coach after leading her squad to bottom of the group in the World Cup and then tearing a strip off them after a few snifters.

If nothing else, she should at least have been advised to hold her hands up before Friday’s game with Cyprus and plead for clemency from the public. But, nah, there she was stonewalling questions, sticking to the script, showing zero contrition — just like in that evasive, horrific interview broadcast when news first broke of her behaviour.

Maxwell and president Petrie have done the SFA no favours by keeping Kerr, but perhaps there’s a reason why disciplinary action slipped to the bottom of their to-do list alongside rebuilding Hampden in the image of Stuttgart’s Mercedes-Benz Arena (remember that beauty?).

They do have much to be getting on with. There has been no major sponsor for the men’s national team for a year. Maxwell is, however, about to look at a strategy for women’s football with the money from the World Cup, which isn’t bad considering Scotland qualified for it 12 months ago.

The SFA published the interim report from the independent review of sexual abuse in Scottish football around then, too. The final version remains nowhere to be seen.

Of course, maybe all these things are just being saved up for that glorious, sunlit day when an all-smiling, all-knowing Petrie, the real Rod we hear about, scoops us up in his loving embrace and reinvents the game in a festival of light and celebration.

Just one thing. When the party starts, can we just make sure Shelley’s not in charge of the drinks trolley? Thanking you.