QUOTES of the week

‘Love is beautiful. Love is kind. And it turns out love is patient. Twenty years patient.’

Jennifer Lopez confirms her marriage to Ben Affleck, 18 years after they called off their engagement. ‘In your past, you’ve been both a Lib Dem and a Remainer. I was just wondering which one you regretted most?’ Rishi Sunak quizzes rival Liz Truss in a ‘blue on blue’ attack. ‘The reason I am a Conservative is I saw kids at my school being let down. I saw them not get the opportunities that you might have got at your school, Rishi.’

The Foreign Secretary’s

tart response. ‘With all due respect, I am far, far, far more important than any of them will ever be.’

Pink Floyd star Roger Waters hits out after pop critics in Toronto snubbed his gig in favour of one by The Weeknd. ‘Hasta la vista, baby.’ Boris Johnson signs off from his final PMQs in inimitable style.

‘Have you come for your tea?’

Actress Kate Beckinsale sparks debate on social media by posting a clip of herself handfeeding foxes. ‘We’ve honestly never been more offended.’

The World Bollard Association after Boris Johnson accused Keir Starmer of being a ‘great pointless human bollard’. ‘I have to tell you why the cameras are on me. That’s my son and I coach him and he’s the world champion.’

Stadium commentator Geoff Wightman appears on the big screen at the World Athletics Championships after his son Jake won the 1,500m.

‘OMG. When did we get mum and dad bods?’

Ex-Strictly star Ola Jordan posts a snap of her and husband James after being horrified at the amount of weight the pair have put on.