When I won, I cried one last time... with relief that it was all over, with love for my daughter, and with sadness for my dad who died thinking he had failed me
Stewards at the club were so concerned they were going to call an ambulance, but the players assured them they would ensure she got home safely.
They instead got a key to an empty flat in Armadale, West Lothian, where they took Denise and raped her, leaving her in the house with what Lord Armstrong described as a “near-fatal amount of alcohol” in her system.
She added: “It is those lost hours, from taking that fourth drink, which still torment me. There were moments when you begin to doubt yourself.
“When the stories of the so-called ‘party’ emerged, I thought: ‘Did I do that? Did I behave so incredibly out of character?’
“I know now it was all lies. I’ve never been much of a drinker or taken drugs and I think that made me an easy target. “I was lucky if I went out more than a couple of nights in a year.
“My daughter and my family were the centre of my
universe.”
But the legacy of that rare night out continues to torment her.
She added: “I still don’t fully know what happened in that flat in Armadale. I forced myself to sit through the evidence of Goodwillie and Robertson before Lord Armstrong.
“It made me physically sick but I steeled myself.
“For the terrible thing is that since I awoke in that house – naked, cold, disorientated and in pain – my every moment, waking and asleep, has been haunted by it. It fills my days and my nightmares.
“Those lost hours and what happened during them torment me. I cannot explain how I went from finishing my third drink to having no memory of anything that came after it.”
However, Lord Armstrong’s judgment goes a long way to drawing a definitive line under her torment.
She said: “I feel vindicated, more able to go forward. It has been a trial since I waived my right to anonymity and publicly accuse the two men who abused me.
“I was, however, ill-prepared for the backlash. A storm broke around me, a storm which worsened when the Crown decided to drop a rape charge against Goodwillie.”
The respectable young mother, whose late father, John, was a social worker and wellknown community activist, added: “My determination to tell the truth and to let the world see my face cost me my job, my sanity and almost my life.
“I became a target for hundreds of internet trolls who threatened to rape and kill me.
“One sick troll posted a message saying he knew where I lived and threatened to come and rape me, encouraging others to join in.
“A part of me dismissed it as internet bile, which is so common nowadays, but how could I be sure?
“Was he serious? Did he really know where I was? Was he out there, waiting?
“I was so alarmed I became a virtual recluse, afraid to leave my home.”
Denise became so concerned for her