Shrug off mental health stigma and get help
IT’S blighted his life and even made him try to take it.
Now Anthony Heslop, from Durham, hopes he at last has control of the bipolar disorder that’s caused so much misery.
And, speaking ahead of World Bipolar Day and in the week former Liberal leader Lord Steel revealed his wife had been hospitalised with the condition, he’s urging others to shrug off mental health stigma and seek help.
“I’ve had this man and boy,” said Anthony, 53, an engineer at the Nissan car plant in Sunderland.
“In my early 20s I was working on building sites when I started acting irrationally.
“I remember one freezing February taking my clothes off and just working in my shorts.
“It went from eccentric to risky. I was doing stupid things like scrambling over open roofs in the snow and ice with a 30ft drop below and tightrope-walking along the safety rails – it lost me my job.”
Anthony was also prone to impulsive spending sprees, running up debts that left wife Jacqueline in despair.
Bipolar, also known as manic depression, is characterised by dramatic mood swings, alternating between manic highs and depressive lows.
“You feel euphoric and invulnerable. You get fixated and need to have things,” said the dad-of-three.
“But then that went into a major episode of depression. I felt worthless and I tried to commit suicide by taking an overdose of pills.
“Mental health services became involved, but because I was functioning otherwise it wasn’t recognised as bipolar.
“I was in and out of psychiatric units for several months at a time on four or five occasions before I was finally diagnosed in my 40s.”
Anthony said it took a huge toll on family life with Jacqueline bearing the brunt of the worry.
“Bless her, she stood by me through all of this. But it was a lot of hard work looking after three young children, holding down a job and coming to see me in hospital every day.
“She managed for years before succumbing to depression herself, although she’s thankfully on the up.”
Honesty with kids Rebecca, now 30, Charlotte, 25, and Nathaniel, 18, has been essential, telling them as much as possible without scaring them.
“When they saw me at my worst it was very frightening,” he admitted.
Anthony had previously been given a succession of anti-depressants which had no impact. But after his diagnosis he was put on mood-stabiliser drugs. They targeted the wild changes, from out-of-control highs to black, bottomless lows.
“They have kept it pretty well under control,” he explains.
As well as the pills, Anthony has been helped hugely by the Bipolar UK charity, with regular peer support group meetings and material to help monitor his moods.
Ahead of World Bipolar Day on March 30, Anthony has one simple message.
“Go and seek help and don’t be stopped by discrimination.”
Visit bipolaruk.org