My grand daughter is getting bullied by a boy at nursery but her parents won’ t complain
Dear Maggie
My husband and I were delighted when our son Callum and his wife Moira asked us if we would look after our four-year-old granddaughter Hazel so Moira could go back to work.
We enjoy getting Hazel washed and dressed, sharing breakfast with her and taking her to nursery for the morning. When we pick her up at lunchtime she is full of stories about what she’s been doing.
But in the past few weeks she has said to me several times that “a bad boy called Tom pulls her hair and calls her “fatty”. This really upsets her.
I said to Callum and Moira they should speak to the nursery teacher about this but they said they don’t want to make a fuss about it. I can’t understand their attitude.
Hazel is a sensitive wee girl. Surely her parents should protect her from this boy who is bullying her?
Maggie says
You clearly love your little granddaughter and want to protect her from being bullied. That’s perfectly natural and it must be upsetting to see Hazel anxious and upset.
But her mum and dad don’t want to complain to the nursery about this and I think you have to accept their decision. Hopefully Hazel will learn how to stand up for herself and not allow this boy’s behaviour to upset her too much.
When you pick her up from nursery have a chat about her day. If the situation escalates and she feels upset about this boy’s behaviour, tell her mum and dad what she’s said and hopefully they will deal with it.
Grandparents often walk a tight line between the way they raised their own children and how they expect their grandchildren to be raised. Hazel knows you love her and are there for her. That’s what matters.
Dear Maggie
My wife Sadie and I have been happily married for 24 years and later this year it’s our silver wedding. I want to have a party for all our family, friends and colleagues. But Sadie doesn’t think that’s a good idea. She’d prefer we celebrated our anniversary together on a foreign holiday.
Every other week she brings home brochures from travel agents.
The latest thing to catch her attention is a luxury cruise. It’s not that I’m being mean about spending money but I just want to share this special anniversary with our children, grandchildren and friends. Is that so wrong?
Maggie Says
No there’s nothing wrong in having an opinion about how you want to celebrate your silver wedding. A party for the people who have been part of your life together over the past 25 years sounds a good idea.
But perhaps your wife Sadie simply wants to share a special holiday with you alone on a luxury cruise.
Try talking this through calmly with her and explain how you feel. Perhaps with a bit of a compromise you could both celebrate this special wedding anniversary by combining a party for friends and family followed by a holiday in a destination you have never visited before.
I do hope this works out for both of you and your silver wedding celebration is something that you will always remember for all the right reasons. Maggie Listens, The Sunday Post, Speirs View, 50 High Craighall Road, Glasgow G4 9UD maggielistens@sundaypost.com