A HAPPY NEWME
In January, we aim to be better versions of ourselves though most of us give up. Meet three people who didn’t
When 2018 started I had been struggling through a very difficult period in my life.
In the previous nine months, I had watched my home burn down along with all my belongings, my beloved cat perished in the blaze, and I went through a divorce after my marriage broke down.
Despite all this, going into a new year, I convinced myself I was coping. I moved from Dunblane to Dundee, I began focusing on training for a body building competition, and I started a new college course. I became devoted to posting about my life online, sharing snaps from my “fresh start”, trying to prove to everyone that I was Wonder Woman. I wanted friends and family – and even strangers – to think the previous year hadn’t affected me.
But looking back I was far from OK.
My real life wasn’t the sunny, happy-go-lucky version I had created on social media. I was living alone, desperate for validation and battling seriously deteriorated mental health. Then in March I reached rock bottom. I wanted to end it all and found myself on the edge of the Tay Road Bridge ready to jump. Thankfully, I was talked down – and that’s when my life completely changed.
In the weeks following my suicide attempt, I received unbelievable care and support. I learned that I was living my life for other people, creating a persona to hide the real me, and discovered why I had felt different.
I was diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder, which impacts how you react with others, and that marked a huge turning point.
As part of my treatment I started a blog called The Empowered Woman Project, where I shared my journey and documented my feelings. And what started as my own form of therapy has now grown into an online community with thousands of followers.
As part of the project I have hosted events, started petitions, crowd-funded an exhibition of contributors’ stories, and created a safe space to talk about mental health. Next year, our work will even be turned into a podcast.
I have achieved so much in terms of personal growth and seeing everything more clearly. So, in a weird way, I’m glad everything happened the way it did. As the nation returns to work and the glow of the festive season fades to a distant memory all thoughts are turning to the annual life overhaul.
One in five of us will be making a New Year’s resolution this month, even though statistics show that only a quarter of us will manage to keep our promises. Yougov Omnibus data reveals that 22% of Brits say they intend to make a New Year’s resolution, with young people by far the most likely – more than 37% of 18-24 year olds saying they will make changes. Only 15% of the over 65s pledge to make a change. Women are also slightly more likely than men to form a pact with themselves for the coming year, at 24% compared to 19%. Here, we speak to three people whose lives changed in the last 12 months to ask how they did it.