With loneliness on the rise and work pressures increasing, Howtowinfriends

Ma k in g fr iends seems easy in yo u t h , especially during school and college, and even when starting work. It often only takes a friendly hello or a simple introduction. Factor in a par tner and children and along come new chums, made over dinner parties, and playdates, school functions and coffee mornings.

But as l i fe e vo l ve s and work and domestic demands weigh heavy, it can be difficult to find the time to sustain old friendships, let alone make new ones.

And, as kids fly the nest and retirement looms, those friendships may have all but disappeared. That’s when loneliness can creep in.

Psychotherapist Dr Jane Graham, says friendships are important to our health and wellbeing, and she offers some advice on how to make new friends, and re- connect with old ones.

Dr Graham, a trauma exper t with a special interest in the menopause and the psychological challenges of mid- to- later life, says:“Things get more difficult as we get older, because – through no fault of our own – we can become isolated. “Sometimes work stress means we just have enough energy for what we do, but then we go home and don’t really

Alex Gray, left, and Lorna Dawson share a passion for true crime connect with people. In retirement, there is often a loss of identity and of feeling a bit stuck. “Maybe you didn’t develop enough social activity and social contact in the latter part of your working life to have those connections when you stop work. There can also be the death of a spouse or a partner, failing health, decreased mobility and/ or visual or audial impairment. Maybe the children have moved away. Maybe there are no children.all of these factors can contribute to the sense of isolation.

“We know categorically there are real positives to having friendships, in terms of your physical and mental health and wellbeing. This is because