Easter is such a happy time, so should we break lock down to get the family together?

Looking for practical advice, relationship help or emotional support? As a mum of four, gran of eight and dear friend to many, Margaret Clayton’s years of experience make her the ideal person to turn to

Dear Maggie

Every year my family come to us on Easter Sunday and we go for a long walk together, our grandkids roll their hand-painted eggs down a hill near our house and we come home for a chicken dinner followed by lots of chocolate cake.

It’s always a really happy occasion but this year, because of lockdown restrictions, we can’t all be together. Some of the family think we should risk it but some are uncomfortable with the idea. My husband says its up to me to decide but I just don’t know what’s best. Sticking to the rules or risk breaking them and then feeling guilty if anything goes wrong? What do you suggest? Maggie says

You are not alone in wondering what’s best right now. Many families face the same problem. At Easter we want to be together to share a meal, paint and roll eggs with the children, and relax and enjoy the company of family and friends. But lockdown restrictions are there for a reason. Many lives have been lost because of this cruel pandemic. Hopefully before too long normal life will resume again. It’s what we are all longing for. But until the infection rates drop I think we have to accept the restrictions and understand that in the end it will be worth it.

So my advice would be stay home, stay safe and cook a nice meal for your husband and yourself, share a phone call or a Zoom catch-up with the family online. I know you will miss being with them but hopefully if we all stick to the rules it won’t be too long before life returns to normal. Won’t that be something we will all celebrate? I guess there will be lots of parties for missed birthdays and special occasions. Times have been tough but freedom from lockdown isn’t too far away. Spring is a season of hope and new beginnings. It will be a different Easter I know, but try to enjoy it – safely.

Dear Maggie

My son and his girlfriend have been together for five years and they were very happy years for them and for us as she quickly became part of our family and we enjoyed her company. They had plans to marry and we were all delighted.

But two months ago our son told us the relationship was over. We were stunned, as we hadn’t seen it coming.

Our son is heartbroken but won’t explain what went wrong.

Maggie says

I know how much you must be hurting, seeing two people you care about ending a relationship which had brought them happiness. But it is their decision and you have to accept that. Perhaps in time your son will be able to talk to you about what went wrong, but now is not the time to put pressure on him. Just let him come to terms with this himself and hopefully he will get his energy back and be able to understand why his girlfriend decided it was over.

He needs the support of his family right now. I do hope that before too long he is able to share his emotions with you

– but don’t rush him. Let him decide when he is ready.

I’ve asked both of them to come round to our house together to try to sort it out. But when I phoned his girlfriend she said she doesn’t want to discuss it. Is there anything I can do to help them?