Focus on the good you did

Dear June

I RETIRED six years ago after working with troubled and abused young people every day.

Although the work was challenging at times, I helped many of them get back on track after a bad start in life.

But I also feel I have failed others mainly due to the rules and restrictions in the job and I still feel guilt.

Anon, Perthshire.

June Says

Sadly, each and every job is governed with rules and regulations.

In a position such as yours I am assuming their particular set of rules was for both the protection of those employed and those seeking assistance.

I have a good friend who held a position of high rank in the Army. He was overseas and could have intervened and prevented mass murder in a village but was ordered by his superiors to stand down.

A few days later his group arrived at the village and discovered those killed were women and children.

Feelings of guilt have remained with him to this day as he felt he could have helped, but he was governed by the rules a ranking officer has to obey.

During his many deployments abroad, he has prevented many disasters and saved the lives of thousands of people.

I spoke to him after his return and told him to concentrate on the positive and not the negative aspects that were out with his control.

You must also try to focus on those people you managed to help, who are now able to live their lives and actually enjoy them.