My surly neighbours treat me like a total stranger. I’m sick of it

Dear Maggie

Over the years, I’ve had some good neighbours who were like family to me.

I still live in the same street, but now I find the neighbours don’t want to know me.

They just walk past and ignore me.

But if someone passes away they soon come for a collection which I refuse to give.

This makes me feel guilty. How can I get on with these neighbours?

Maggie says

I’m sorry to hear you are having a difficult time with your neighbours.

Don’t take it personally – it may just be they are busy or prefer to keep their distance from everyone – not just you. Smile pleasantly and say: “Good morning” or make some comment about the weather if you meet in the street.

Treat everyone the same way, with an open, friendly manner.

When a neighbour comes to your door to ask if you want to contribute to a collection for someone who has died, that is entirely up to you whether you choose to give or not.

Don’t be defensive about it – just say what you feel.

A warm smile and a cheerful manner may help to break the ice and hopefully before too long you and your neighbours will build up trust, respect and discover that you have more in common than you realised. Good luck.