Why your boss needs to help you through the menopause
HRT could soon be available over the counter. But the fight is not over as campaigners now address office culture. By Kerry Potter
As any office worker knows, meetings are a necessary evil. But for Barbara Claypole, 50, they became unbearably hellish when she suddenly plunged into surgical menopause at 46, following a hysterectomy. “It felt like someone had hoovered out half my brain,” says the former senior customer services manager from Hertfordshire. “My memory was shot to pieces. I was taking so many notes in meetings.” Not that she wanted to contribute anyway: “I felt hot and sweaty all the time so if I was in a room with no air conditioning, I rarely spoke because I didn’t want people to notice how flushed I was.”
Although her team was supportive, at times her job was difficult. “I didn’t want sympathy,” says Barbara, and adds she requested small tweaks to her job including short breaks between meetings to manage hot flushes. “Eventually I just didn’t have the energy to keep battling so I left. I’m proud I put my wellbeing first but I’m not proud of the wider culture around menopause that forces women into these kinds of decisions. I felt very alone.”
Unfortunately, however, Barbara is not alone. The menopause, and its accompanying symptoms, can be a challenging time for working women. A quarter consider leaving their jobs, according to a recent survey of 2,000 women aged between 45 and 67, commissioned by childcare agency Koru Kids, with 63 per cent saying their company had no menopause support in place. A 2019 survey by Bupa and the Chartered Institute for Personnel and Development (CIPD) found that three in five menopausal women were negatively impacted at work and almost 900,000 left their jobs due to symptoms.
Sometimes things really escalate. “There’s a small but increasing number of tribunals related to menopause discrimination, and I’m surprised there aren’t more when you consider how many women are going through menopause in the workplace,” says Jo Davis, employment partner at law firm BP Collins.
Caroline Nokes MP, the chair of the Women and Equalities Committee, is leading an inquiry into menopause in the workplace, which is examining existing legislation.
She notes that in many menopauserelated tribunals, lawyers find that using disability discrimination legislation is their best bet, as disability is considered a protected characteristic under the Equalities Act.
“Having to call menopause a disability adds to the whole stigma and taboo,” says Nokes. She would like to see a working world where these issues don’t reach the tribunal stage. “It’s not about companies just having a good menopause policy in place, it has to be effective. You need an open culture so women can have conversations with their managers and an HR department that will provide support.
“The menopause happens mostly to women who are at the peak of their careers – they’re both hugely knowledgeable and role models for younger women in the organisation. If you start losing them from the workforce, you lose the talent.”
Nokes, 49, had a revelation about her own perimenopausal symptoms after watching fellow MP Liz Kendall speak out about her experiences in the House of Commons. This was last October, during the second reading of Carolyn Harris’s private members’ bill, which successfully petitioned the Government to reduce HRT prescription charges.
“Liz was very brave to list off her symptoms and I realised that I had some of them too – sleeplessness and night sweats. I went home and talked to my partner who urged me to see the doctor. I did and started HRT recently. I wouldn’t have been anywhere near as open about this 12 months ago but in parliament we’re now all talking about menopause in the tea rooms and if male colleagues find it awkward then tough!”
Change is afoot – and so it should be when you consider CIPD data that women over the age of 50 are the fastest growing demographic in the workplace. The news earlier this month that HRT could soon be available over the counter in a pharmacy, without a prescription, is welcome news. However, the fight is not over.
Over 500 firms across a range of industries, including Channel 4, Asos, Citi and Timpson, have signed up to the Menopause Workplace Pledge, launched in 2020. “Research shows that it’s in the workplace that women struggle most to manage their menopause symptoms,” says Janet Lindsay, CEO of Wellbeing Of Women, the charity that created the pledge. “It’s important that all employers are understanding of the impact that menopause can have and offer open conversation and support.”
Timpson, the family-run cobblers, has led the way. In October, James Timpson announced the company would cover staffers’ HRT prescriptions. The take-up of this offer has been strong, says Laura Garside, the firm’s HR advisor and menopause champion. “And the fact that we’re nailing our colours to the mast with this benefit has helped open up the wider conversation about menopause.
“We ensure that any communication isn’t just sent to women of a certain age, it’s in our weekly newsletter which is read by everyone.”
Even the notoriously male-dominated banking sector is making changes to support – and retain – female talent.
Citi – the first Wall Street bank run by a woman, Brit Jane Fraser who became CEO last year – introduced a miscarriage and menopause leave policy last October in the UK, the first of the global group’s territories to do so. James Bardrick, UK head of Citi, says: “We need to show empathy for life’s challenges or issues that confront us all. This was the right thing to do to make Citi more reflective of the society we live in, while also being the right thing for our business. We need to ensure people want to stay with us over the length of their careers.”
Many smaller companies, without vast HR budgets, are also introducing menopause support. When Ruth Parsley, 59, accounts administrator at Harriet Kelsall Bespoke Jewellery, first experienced symptoms a decade ago, while in a previous job, she thought she had Alzheimer’s. She “ploughed on through” and suffered in silence but now she wants to support colleagues at her current workplace.
“I’ve just emailed my boss to discuss how we can do this and she’s very receptive. I feel it’s my duty to help prepare younger woman so they’re not as frightened as I was.”
Meera Bhogal, 53, also had a rough ride. She now offers menopause training both within her companies – Oakley Montessori School in Pinner, Middlesex and health food brand Meera’s Made From Scratch – and to other firms.
“My periods became so heavy and erratic, there were days when I couldn’t get to work on time because I couldn’t get out of the loo,” she says.
“By 2pm I was useless because I was so tired – I’d need a nap. I felt I was failing as a boss because I couldn’t look after myself properly, let alone support my staff.” Having since instigated a more open workplace culture and flexible working options, she’s particularly passionate about helping other South Asian women.
Everyone I speak to believes that millennial and generation Z women will be far less likely to put up and shut up when they reach menopause, in the way that older generations have. “It feels like we’re at the stage we were at with mental health a few years ago,” says employment lawyer Jo Davis. “Employers are increasingly well informed and sympathetic. They are raising their game. And with more women in senior positions, hopefully there will be more understanding.”
As for Barbara Claypole, two years on from reluctantly leaving her job, she has carved out a new path as a menopause advocate. “I now feel so much better. It took a while for my body to adjust, to find the right dosage of HRT, to learn how to manage my symptoms. Looking back now I think, ‘how sad’. I left my career behind and I really didn’t need to. I hope that menopause becomes a subject that we don’t really have to speak up about – it’ll just be embedded, as part of the culture, something that happens in working women’s lives with the necessary support in place.”
‘Having to call menopause a disability adds to the whole stigma and taboo’