Landlord, fill the flowing bowl – with your finest latte
Three new coffee houses open gloomy old boy at the counter is Ted; announcers will have difficulty in every day in Britain and it is he’s always complaining that his pronouncing. predicted that by 2030 they will cappuccino hasn’t got a decent head Once you have the heir to the throne outnumber pubs. If you have a on it. I think we’ll steer clear of that associated with some piece of traffic fondness for the old pub culture you earnest group by the window. They’re news terminology, it could have need not fret, because the new breed from Carm, the Campaign for Real serious long-term consequences, of coffee hostelries will supply plenty Macchiato. They’re perfectly OK, but setting a trend for giving members mbers of of that. You can see signs of it already. they tend to go on a bit. the Royal family motorway-related elated Let me show you around the Jolly Java At the far end you can see our online titles, and this would inevitably ly spread y. Bean, which is very much the social darts team. They’re playing against the to members of the aristocracy. hub in the quaint Cotswold village of Milk Frothers Arms in the local league. Here is how the Court & Social cial page Long Meddlesham. Sounds like they’re winning, too. By might read in future: “HRH the he Duke
As soon as you enter, you are the way, would you like something to of Tailback this morning officially ially cheered by the merry steamy hiss and eat? They do a very good almond opened the ninth lane of the M25. He clatter of the coffee machines as the croissant ploughman’s here. And I was accompanied by the Duchess. hess. baristas serve those foaming must tell you the latest joke I heard Miss Letitia Anti-Clockwise presented resented cappuccinos. The landlord is a jovial from Nigel. It seems there was this a bouquet to Her Royal Highness. ness. chap; he’s the one over there with duck and it went into Starbucks, “This afternoon the Countess ess of “Guvna” printed on the back of his walked up to the counter and said… Hanger Lane Gyratory System m shirt. The only trouble is, he tends to accompanied her son, Viscount nt faint a lot, because regulars come in Junction (13) to attend his first t term and say: “Two double espressos please, at Eton College. He will be in South Guvna, and have one yourself.” Mimms house. In the evening the
That old couple at the table in the Countess attended a performance ance of corner are Stan and Edna. Lovely The Hogarth Roundabout at the he people. Been coming here for years. Royal Opera house. The director tor of They’re always at the same table, music, Sir Toddington Turnoff, ff, was never speaking, nursing their laptops presented to her. all day. If you offer to top up their “The infant son of Lord and Lady skinny lattes they won’t say no. The Gap has been christened Watford. I would strongly advise Prince Charles not to encourage the authorities to call the second Severn crossing the Prince of Wales Bridge. It would only mean he could become associated with depressing traffic reports of high-sided vehicles, fog and lane closures. Much better to leave it to the Welsh to make the choice so they can pick something the radio The godparents were Sir Thelwall Viaduct and Lady Geraldine HazardWarning-Light. The Rev Snake Pass officiated.”
Tracey Emin’s message, in large il illuminated pink script across 20 metre metres in St Pancras station, in Londo London, reads: “I want my time with you.” A Apparently, this expresses her love fo for Europe. Oddly enough, I had been p planning my own illuminated install installation in the same spot, under the clo clock, when Tracey beat me to it. I had ju just been trying to make up my mind w which message to put there. These were some of my options: “T “The departures board never lets you know the platform till the very last minute.”
“Why do I always arrive too ear early for my train?” “Feeling forlorn in WH Smith.” “Would it do any good, do you suppose, to pray to St Pancras?” “Let’s have a game of hunt the litter bin.”
“Listen to that rumble of 10,000 suitcases on wheels.”
“O terminus! O mores!”