Tips from How To Stay Married

The wedding Try not to get too drunk, it will cause recriminations later.

Housework Cheerfulness, sexual enthusiasm and good cooking are far nearer to godliness than cleanliness about the house.

Bad habits Don’t worry about them, quirks that irritate you now could become lovable traits in later years.

Arguments Don’t harbour grudges, never send someone to Coventry and maintain a sense of humour.

Infidelity If your husband looks happy on a Monday morning and miserable on a Friday night, he’s probably having an affair at work.

The in-laws Ideally, marry an orphan. Otherwise, avoid staying with your in-laws at Christmas by getting a large dog and saying you can’t leave it.