The Sunday Telegraph

The new phrases you need on holiday

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I’ve been away. Sorry. Away away, on an actual aeroplane, long haul, for work. (Who am I trying to kid? It was the reopening of Richard Branson’s Necker Island, for the travel section. Check it out in yesterday’s paper.) You can tell how long it’s been because I just had to check how to spell “aeroplane”. I am now so proficient at nasal tests, medical types applaud, crying: “Great swab!”

If anyone tries to tell you that the form filling is straightfo­rward, treat them with the scorn they deserve. Necker is a green-zone destinatio­n, and still it was akin to having to work out one’s astrologic­al chart in each new queue: only on a mobile, at 4am, in Urdu, complete with Kafka-esque officials looming over you, suspicious that you weren’t aware that your moon was in Capricorn.

Happily, the languagele­arning types at Busuu have compiled a list of phrases to help us out. “J’ai eu le vaccin AstraZenec­a,” we will chirp. “¿Necesita ver el resultado de mi PCR?” “Mi scusi, è da un po’ che non esco dal Regno Unito!” And, most vital of all, three different ways of expressing: “Is alcohol allowed here?”

 ??  ?? Necker island: green list, but travel rules were labyrinthi­ne
Necker island: green list, but travel rules were labyrinthi­ne

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