I’ll never forget what’s-his-name
“Your lectures give ditchwater a bad name.”
“You always yawn before you speak. The reason for the yawn is only apparent when one hears what you have to say.”
“Halfway through your last lecture, I heard a faint recurrent sound. Yes, it was paint drying.” These were just some of negative comments contained in a recent student assessment of Professor Lapping’s second-year Media and Cultural Studies course,
“Stepping Backwards: Gender Stereotyping in Come Dancing”.
Despite the evidently negative nature of these comments, Professor Lapping said that he was far from being discomfited.
“Although such comments are made anonymously, I completely subscribe to the recent declaration by Darren Reid, lecturer in history at Coventry University, that it is fairly easy to work out who was responsible by checking their consistency with the speaking patterns and opinions of known students.
“In this case,” continued Professor Lapping, “it is clear
that all those negative comments are the work of a single secondyear undergraduate.”
Was Professor Lapping prepared to name his critic?
“That would be most unfair. Although, as Dr Reid makes clear, anonymity is difficult to preserve in the current student feedback system, it is surely an ideal to which we must all subscribe. So suffice it to say that my student critic is a redhaired malingering male know-nothing with a Jay-Z T-shirt, a possible drug habit and bad eczema. Further than that, I’m not prepared to go.”