THIS IS LIVING?

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I wrote this and posted it to an insurance company with whom I have a life policy. They continued sending me letters urging me to increase my life cover. Having received three in three weeks, I thought it was time they had one from me.

Peter Aylett, Orpington, Kent

I’ve taken out a policy, heeding your advice,

But still you send me letters, not once, not twice but thrice. I receive one every week, it seems, inviting me to take A guaranteed over-fifty plan, and so increase the stake. I’ve given what I can afford to help the poor bereft,

So let me spend my final years with cash that I have left. No more correspondence please, as it will be unread. ’Cause if I have no cash to live, I might as well be dead.