‘I BOUGHT A COFFEE MACHINE FOR SEVEN GRAND. FLAT WHITE IS MY SPECIALITY’

MARCUS ‘THE BULLET’ ARMITAGE

What was your first car and what do you drive now?

My first car was a £500 Nissan Micra. I crashed it four or five times so me and my dad rebuilt it using parts we got from a scrapyard. Now I’ve got a VW Transporter and a Tesla. The VW’S a passion wagon for me and (girlfriend) Lucy, and really speedy.

What was your first job?

Carpet fitting. My dad sold carpets on Oldham market. I was selling rugs and giving it the patter on the stall with my cousins from about the age of 10, but then I did the fitting with a guy who worked for my dad. I fell asleep on someone’s stairs once. I’d had a heavy night. The fitter was upstairs in a big bedroom so I thought I’d stick my head down on a step. He found me there, fast asleep.

Aside from a house or car, what has been your most extravagant purchase?

My La Marzocco coffee machine. It cost me seven grand. Flat white is my speciality but I’m not barista level yet. I’m going to get into roasting. I’ve got the name ready – Bullet’s Beans!

What’s the most money you’ve ever gambled on the course?

Against Teddy Sheringham. We played for £500 but I think we both had the same outlook. He was thinking: worst case scenario, I’ve paid £500 to play with a European Tour player.

And I’m thinking: I’m a big Man United fan and if I lose, I’ve still played with one of my heroes.

What was the result?

A consensual half.

What is your most prized possession?

The Lion King coin that I mark putts with. I got it for

I farted in France on the Challenge Tour and followed through. Even worse, I had cream trousers on. I was playing with Jordan Smith. He said, “I think you’d better go to the toilet and stop off at the pro shop as well.”

When did you last break a golf club?

The 18th hole at last year’s Scottish Open. I put my foot through my putter. It’s the putter I won with as well. I now have half a putter on the window sill in the spare room. I won’t get rid of it. It’s a reminder of the win.

Any pre-round rituals or superstitions?

I can’t wear odd socks.

Any hidden talents or party tricks?

I’m pretty good at the splits. Remember that cereal box trick – picking it up off the floor without using your hands? I’m good at that. Well, I was good at it about 10 years ago.

Which course in Europe should stage the next Ryder Cup?

How about Green Eagle in Germany? I’ve won (the 2021 European Open) there and I’d love to see the tree they planted for me on the 18th being broadcast at the Ryder Cup. Actually, I’d love to play in it!

What would you prefer to do: win a Major or hole the winning putt in the Ryder Cup?

Win a Major. Which Major? It would have to be the Masters!