People who rocked our month

...is a living, climbing legend. His book Psycho Vertical reached into the psyche of readers way beyond the climbing communities with his honesty and razor-sharp reflections on pushing yourself to the extreme. Andy tells us about his new award-winning fil

The film made me reflect on how screwedup I was for most of my life.

And maybe that’s the beauty of writing it all down, or making a film, in that it gives you the opportunity to get the measure of yourself – something not easy when you’re just living that measure.

It is about forgiveness and clarity.

How you need to let go and forgive the past, and how this is easier when you find yourself becoming like those you need to forgive – when you make the same mistakes as them. I feel this comes across more towards the end of the film when I discover I’m making the same mistakes in my life as my dad did.

Sounds clichéd but the film is a real collaboration.

Jen Randall as director, Al Gorham’s stills, Ben Pritchard’s camera work and then me – I guess – climbing and telling my story.

The film is also Jen’s impression of me, so has less jokes than a film I’d make, but is also more beautiful, deep and poetic (it makes people think – and even cry).

I still have the same drive to push myself to extremes.

But that abandon is tempered by more experience and mountain wisdom. It is also true that

because of that I still have objectives that would scare the bejesus out of my young, crazy self!

There is something wrong with me and has been since I was born.

Things like not being able to remember colours, or months, tell the time, read, spell, all sorts of things. These problems handicapped me in many ways, but for every avenue that was blocked, these same glorious logjams in my head bashed out new ones.

What I’m saying, I guess, is that I ended up with few opportunities, and climbing – and doing dangerous stuff – was all I really had, or all I thought I had.

Emails addressed as urgent scare me.

Letters from accountants, HMRC, bills, credit checks, bank statements, lists, roaming fees, car rental people behind the desk when you arrive and the ones who check your car when you return, unplayed messages... But never climbing.

Nothing ever goes to plan.

So I can handle that (isn’t that the point?). When things are really serious I try to slow down rather than speed up – a good tip for anyone who finds things are getting out of control (like getting lost on the hill when you want to rush on, when really you should slow down and stop).

I keep pushing boundaries.

Because dying gets a day closer every day.

My wife Vanessa would say brushing my teeth has been my hardest challenge to date.

But right now I’d say it was trying to finish a book while living on the road – yes, real life is the hardest challenge!

In terms of tough climbs, there are so many category 2 experiences (bad at the time, good in the bar) it’s impossible to choose between them, but I see all – even those verging on category 3 (just bad forever) – as being a gift.